Whew! I made it through two weeks so far. It is amazing at how quickly time goes. When I get back from the conference and spring break, there is only 5 weeks left. It is so crazy. I remember my first steps on this campus and wishing that I would be graduating and now that it’s here, I don’t want it to happen. Agh! Why do I do this to myself?
For the past couple of days, I have been thinking about how I want to teach the students and the direction I want to go. I have been giving the cooperating teachers various ideas about how I want to do it. Taking what the students are saying into consideration, I didn’t want to just focus on doing the same things every time. I was thinking about doing 1 day aerobics, 1 day weights, and 1 day skill/game; 1 day aerobics, 1 day skill, and 1 day game; or alternating 1 day aerobics/weights and then a skill/game day. However, with every idea that I have been presenting, the male cooperating teacher keeps shooting those ideas down. He is still so stuck in the traditional views of physical education on how you have to have a unit, do that unit every day, and then give them skill and question based testing at the end. However, at the end of the day, my cooperating teacher came up to me and told me that whatever I have planned to teach and whatever way I want to implement it would be fine with her. I was so relieved to leave today knowing this.
My first class of the day finished the Tae-Bo unit and weight room. They did a lot better today with the video because it was the last day. It kind of feels like watching your own kids (or in my case, my nephew). I love it when the light bulb finally goes off and they understand things. It makes me so happy to see this reaction in students. However, this was one of the classes I talked to the day before about picking up their intensity levels and they definitely did so during this class, but who’s to say it was my little speech to them that made them pick up their intensity levels? It very well could have been because the teacher was in and out as well. They still don’t really participate when she leaves the room.
As I was running with the kids during this period, I thought to myself “Just because you had to do it when you were younger doesn’t give you the excuse to not do it now.” You can’t tell your students to do something and when they start complaining, you use this excuse. We need to practicing what we are preaching; we have to be living what we are telling our students to do. It really upsets me when a teacher, or anyone for that matter, tells someone in lesser authority than them to do something, but then they can’t do it themselves.
The second class also finished up their last day of Tae-Bo and we went outside and did the walk/run. I was very pleased that two of the boys (high skilled) wanted a challenge during the walk/run so I told them a little bit about fartleks. They were interested in doing them and I helped them do it. At the very end of the walk/run, they were completely gassed, but they said that they enjoyed doing them. Then during Tae-Bo, there was one girl who just wasn’t doing it. She was even complacent to not do anything when we went outside. I pulled her aside and talked to her about why she didn’t want to do Tae-Bo and why she wasn’t giving her best effort when we went outside. She proceeded to tell me that doing Tae-Bo makes her feel weird. I asked her if she liked to run and she said yes. “Then why don’t you do so outside.” She just shrugged her shoulders and went back to her spot during Tae-Bo. Most of the students who dislike Tae-Bo have said it makes them feel uncomfortable and weird. I wonder if it’s from the moves, the guy in the video (his wardrobe), or they just think that they look crazy doing some of the movements.
There is also a group of girls in this class who have created their own little “click.” They are mean in the stuff that they say and how they act towards other people. I have tried talking to a few of the girls, but it seems as if nothing is helping them to change their attitudes towards others. Maybe I am just not trying hard enough or if I don’t have the respect from them yet.
The third class did all run kickball and needless to say, they absolutely hated it. Periodically, I kept asking them how they could change the game to make it better for them. They just kept talking about going back to the way they knew how to do it (one kicker, one base runner) as opposed to all running. It was like pulling teeth just to finish the class off right; they didn’t want to run anymore. They were really tired after the class was over. With this class, we probably won’t do that kind of activity again. I will have to find another way to teach the students about different intensity levels without using that game.
I was rather proud of my thinking after this class was over. Rather than take what the kids were saying about the activity as a personal attack on how I teach and what
I teach, I listened to them and took their suggestions. Just because they didn’t like this activity doesn’t mean they won’t like the others. It was just that for this class, this activity did not suit them as well as it did for the other class periods. Part of my problem though is comparing everything to what we did in 466 and how the students reacted to that. I know I can’t keep doing that because not only was it a really small class and there were lots of us college students, but the students were older and more mature during the activities. I know I just have to give it time, but it’s hard to wait!!!
Today’s assembly was like a pep rally. My job for these assemblies is to make sure students have the right pass to be admitted to the gym. Me being me, I like to joke around with the kids such as saying “That’s your signature and not your teachers. Sorry you can’t go in.” or “Sorry we are at the max, you have to turn around and go back to class.” These students do not know how to take simple jokes and a little sarcasm from me as a teacher. I don’t know if they just aren’t used to a teacher joking around with them or they just don’t understand a joke when they see one.
The first speaker was instructing students how to participate in a pep rally. However, the speaker was quite monotonous and boring. There was no pepping up the students like she should have. Throughout the assembly, various teachers and faculty were trying to silence the students. That is not what a pep rally is; it’s not what you are to do. You can’t tell kids how to participate in a pep rally and then try to silence them.
Well, we get to have 2 weeks off now. It will be interesting to see how I adjust to coming back and getting into the groove of things again. I hope it goes by quick. I just want to be done already.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Friday, March 12, 2010
Day 9...It Was Never About Me (3/11/10)
What is the school trying to say to the students with the pictures of their mascots hanging over the doors of the locker room? Over the boys locker room is just the top half of a human’s body that is clearly muscular but has the head of a falcon (school mascot). This figure is holding a basketball. Overtop of the girl’s locker room is a full body person with the head of a falcon. Like the other, this figure is clearly defined by its muscular composition. This figure is chasing after a volleyball. What kind of self image is the school trying to give these students; one of self-confidence and strength, or one of self doubt and judgment? For years, we have been learning about gender stereotyped sports and how we need to change this image, but here are these pictures depicting such stereotypes and such misconstrued body images.
I feel like we are herding a bunch of animals when we are running with the students in the beginning of the classes. We are the last ones in the back and as soon as we get close to the students, they immediately take off again because they don’t want to get beat. I like challenging the students this way. It shows them that we are willing to make an effort to see them succeed. It’s also a time in which I can talk to the students about how they are feeling, what’s going in with them, and just to see how they are doing. I hope that they appreciate the effort we are trying to show them. Maybe someday it will rub off.
During the first class, I spent the first 10 minutes watching the students and seen how their participation levels have increased since the last time we had class. I just felt this sense of euphoria wash over my body. These students are finally getting it. Regardless of how bad they hate it and think it’s boring, they are still here participating. This could be a result of it being the last day of Tae-Bo or the fact that they have more energy because we didn’t start off the class with our walk/run like normal. Maybe it’s just because I talked to them the last time they had class. Who knows? All I know is that I felt very proud of this group that I got off my butt and stopped writing to participate with them.
The second class was with the adapted P.E. students. I really love this class. Our cooperating teachers had meetings so we were on our own. The one teacher said you can do whatever you want with them. Talk about having to think on your feet and having to come up with an activity in 10 minutes before the students got there. Basically, I grabbed a bunch of hula hoops and poly spots for the students. We were going to work on aiming and throwing. While it was a very last minute lesson, the students really seemed to like it. Then again these students are not that hard to please. Near the end of class, I put on some music for them to listen and dance too. What I love about these students is that they don’t feel any shame, or none that I have seen. These students act the way they are and don’t really care about how other people view them. They can dance to the music any way they want and not be embarrassed. Yes, they provide a challenge when I am trying to meet their needs because each student is so different, but it is no different than dealing with 30 other various skill leveled students. The difference between them is that these students love coming to P.E. and have a good time doing the activities we provided.
The third class was my honors class. We did similar activities to the ones we did when the majority of the girls were missing. However, we only got through group juggling, all aboard, team seating, and add-on tag. The students really really enjoyed doing these activities as a bigger class. With the group juggling, we ended up adding about 7 pieces of equipment. At the end, I challenged them first to see if they could do so without dropping the equipment more than 5 times. They were successful. The next challenge was to do so in under 1:20. While they got it under that time, there were quite a few drops. I told the girls, “Do we ever want to sacrifice the quality of our work just so we can get done quicker?” I got a few mixed responses but I think the girls understood what I was trying to ask them. We did this activity for about 15-20 minutes and headed outside.
The all aboard activity went very well. We started out with four hoops and got it down to one. While they had difficulties getting into the one hoop, it helped to establish who the leaders were in class. I told them, “It doesn’t matter who the leaders are. Do we only have to have one leader? There can be multiple leaders. All of you can be leaders. However, those that follow have to do so in a respectable manner. Does this mean that only the leader can talk during activities? No. If someone has something to say and they aren’t considered a ‘leader’ we still respect their idea and include it into our process.” I had a couple girls ask me to do the team seating again, so we did that as our third activity. The girls liked this one as well and were mature enough to handle it. I don’t think I would try it with a co-ed class just because of maturity levels. As the girls were sitting, I asked them how they were successful. After a few seconds, a few answers, and a few moans and groans from hurting legs, the girls finally figured it out and it was captured in one girls’ response. She said, “It shows us that if you try to be an individual in a team sport, you will be alone, but once you work as a team, you see that you are supported by one another.” (She said it so much better than that, but that was the gist of the idea.)
The last activity was add-on tag. The girls liked this activity too. They liked whenever I jumped into the game and played as well. I like seeing the students working really hard without even realizing it because they are having a good time. This is the ideal class to be working with. I really enjoy watching them come together as a class and start working together. Granted, I don’t know the dynamics of the class before I got there, but I am proud of what I am seeing. There are a few girls who need to learn a little more respect, but that will come with time.
We finished the day with the fourth class. We began the class by signing our rules and consequences poster and then followed it by group juggling. This class too got to 7 pieces of equipment and then we headed outside. With this class, I decided to play all run kickball. Once again, and this is twice in two days, I felt so proud of these students. They were working so hard during this activity and I loved seeing them coming back into the plate breathing heavy and smiling. I just loved seeing them working so hard. I even saw students beginning to cheat, but I don’t think it was because they wanted to win, but because they were that tired. We talked a lot about having fun in P.E. and the students today definitely had fun. This game was new to them. Even at the end of the class, they knew that they had done a lot more running during this activity than what they do for warm ups.
At the end of the day, I left thinking “You know, this is not about me and never will be about me. It’s not about what our cooperating teachers want us to do, about being the best in our field, or gaining that recognition for what we are doing as teachers. It’s not about any of that, but it is about those students. It has never been about me, it has always been about those students.” I hope I never lose sight of this as I continue being an educator.
I feel like we are herding a bunch of animals when we are running with the students in the beginning of the classes. We are the last ones in the back and as soon as we get close to the students, they immediately take off again because they don’t want to get beat. I like challenging the students this way. It shows them that we are willing to make an effort to see them succeed. It’s also a time in which I can talk to the students about how they are feeling, what’s going in with them, and just to see how they are doing. I hope that they appreciate the effort we are trying to show them. Maybe someday it will rub off.
During the first class, I spent the first 10 minutes watching the students and seen how their participation levels have increased since the last time we had class. I just felt this sense of euphoria wash over my body. These students are finally getting it. Regardless of how bad they hate it and think it’s boring, they are still here participating. This could be a result of it being the last day of Tae-Bo or the fact that they have more energy because we didn’t start off the class with our walk/run like normal. Maybe it’s just because I talked to them the last time they had class. Who knows? All I know is that I felt very proud of this group that I got off my butt and stopped writing to participate with them.
The second class was with the adapted P.E. students. I really love this class. Our cooperating teachers had meetings so we were on our own. The one teacher said you can do whatever you want with them. Talk about having to think on your feet and having to come up with an activity in 10 minutes before the students got there. Basically, I grabbed a bunch of hula hoops and poly spots for the students. We were going to work on aiming and throwing. While it was a very last minute lesson, the students really seemed to like it. Then again these students are not that hard to please. Near the end of class, I put on some music for them to listen and dance too. What I love about these students is that they don’t feel any shame, or none that I have seen. These students act the way they are and don’t really care about how other people view them. They can dance to the music any way they want and not be embarrassed. Yes, they provide a challenge when I am trying to meet their needs because each student is so different, but it is no different than dealing with 30 other various skill leveled students. The difference between them is that these students love coming to P.E. and have a good time doing the activities we provided.
The third class was my honors class. We did similar activities to the ones we did when the majority of the girls were missing. However, we only got through group juggling, all aboard, team seating, and add-on tag. The students really really enjoyed doing these activities as a bigger class. With the group juggling, we ended up adding about 7 pieces of equipment. At the end, I challenged them first to see if they could do so without dropping the equipment more than 5 times. They were successful. The next challenge was to do so in under 1:20. While they got it under that time, there were quite a few drops. I told the girls, “Do we ever want to sacrifice the quality of our work just so we can get done quicker?” I got a few mixed responses but I think the girls understood what I was trying to ask them. We did this activity for about 15-20 minutes and headed outside.
The all aboard activity went very well. We started out with four hoops and got it down to one. While they had difficulties getting into the one hoop, it helped to establish who the leaders were in class. I told them, “It doesn’t matter who the leaders are. Do we only have to have one leader? There can be multiple leaders. All of you can be leaders. However, those that follow have to do so in a respectable manner. Does this mean that only the leader can talk during activities? No. If someone has something to say and they aren’t considered a ‘leader’ we still respect their idea and include it into our process.” I had a couple girls ask me to do the team seating again, so we did that as our third activity. The girls liked this one as well and were mature enough to handle it. I don’t think I would try it with a co-ed class just because of maturity levels. As the girls were sitting, I asked them how they were successful. After a few seconds, a few answers, and a few moans and groans from hurting legs, the girls finally figured it out and it was captured in one girls’ response. She said, “It shows us that if you try to be an individual in a team sport, you will be alone, but once you work as a team, you see that you are supported by one another.” (She said it so much better than that, but that was the gist of the idea.)
The last activity was add-on tag. The girls liked this activity too. They liked whenever I jumped into the game and played as well. I like seeing the students working really hard without even realizing it because they are having a good time. This is the ideal class to be working with. I really enjoy watching them come together as a class and start working together. Granted, I don’t know the dynamics of the class before I got there, but I am proud of what I am seeing. There are a few girls who need to learn a little more respect, but that will come with time.
We finished the day with the fourth class. We began the class by signing our rules and consequences poster and then followed it by group juggling. This class too got to 7 pieces of equipment and then we headed outside. With this class, I decided to play all run kickball. Once again, and this is twice in two days, I felt so proud of these students. They were working so hard during this activity and I loved seeing them coming back into the plate breathing heavy and smiling. I just loved seeing them working so hard. I even saw students beginning to cheat, but I don’t think it was because they wanted to win, but because they were that tired. We talked a lot about having fun in P.E. and the students today definitely had fun. This game was new to them. Even at the end of the class, they knew that they had done a lot more running during this activity than what they do for warm ups.
At the end of the day, I left thinking “You know, this is not about me and never will be about me. It’s not about what our cooperating teachers want us to do, about being the best in our field, or gaining that recognition for what we are doing as teachers. It’s not about any of that, but it is about those students. It has never been about me, it has always been about those students.” I hope I never lose sight of this as I continue being an educator.
Day 8...I Used To Be Where You Are (3/10/10)
I don’t want to keep bashing these cooperating teachers. I know that what they are doing is different than what the other schools are doing in this area. It is just the first couple of weeks trying to figure out their systems and teaching practices. Today was a really good day with my cooperating teacher. We spent quite an amount of time talking about what I would be doing with the afternoon classes and telling her why I was doing it. She seems to be coming around to what I am trying to accomplish with the students.
Having my colleague here is really helpful and facilitates my teaching because we are going through similar things together. However, sometimes I wonder if it is taking away and hindering my relationship with my cooperating teacher. I feel as if I am relying on him too much rather than her. We haven’t done a lot of talking about teaching and how she experiences things like the way my last cooperating teacher and I did. I need to try to get out of this little comfort zone I am in with my colleague being here and start conversing with my cooperating teacher. I think that will make things go a little smoother and lessen the tensions between all of us.
Today, I told the one morning class and a few students in the second that I understand what they are feeling. The students are bored with Tae-Bo and they don’t like participating in it. I said to them “I know where you are coming from because there are times where I get bored myself with doing the same tape all day long with the other classes, but just do me one favor. You only have to do this one more time (Friday), so please give me your best effort. Then after this week, you don’t have to worry about doing it again. At this, I got a little bit more participation from the students, but it was still like pulling teeth. At the very end, I addressed the whole class and said “If you have me for next rotation, you will have more fun and like what we do.” I don’t want to discredit my cooperating teacher by saying this, but I wanted to provide the students with a little bit of optimism and hope for future P.E. classes. I will have to see if they do well on Friday.
While the students were getting changed for the class, I heard my cooperating teacher say, you can’t change in the bathroom. Curiously, I asked the teacher why. She explained to me that the students are not allowed to change in the bathroom or back where the showers are. I was completely taken aback by this. She further explained that they had that rule set in place so that there wouldn’t be forty girls changing in the stalls and the showers. I still don’t understand the rule. She said that some 6th graders will try this, but by the time they are in 8th grade, it doesn’t matter to them anyway. There are some pretty big girls who just don’t feel comfortable changing in front of people. I know if it were me, I would still continue to change in the bathroom or shower stall. At this time during a girl’s life, the last thing that she wants to worry about is if somebody is looking at her while changing and making judgments on her body. I know how they feel, I used to be that girl.
At the beginning of the third class, I had one girl walk up to me and we just started talking. During that conversation, she had mentioned that she was glad I was teaching the class now. “Why do you say that?” I replied. “Because you’re cool and we do more fun stuff,” she responded. “Haha okay, but why is it that you were one of the ones who complained about doing the boring work (paperwork).” At this she didn’t respond and we walked into class. Maybe these students are seeing what we are trying to do with them. Maybe she didn’t respond because she couldn’t fully express why she liked the class a little better than with my cooperating teacher. Then again, students seem to like having student teachers more and I think it’s because we offer a variety (I say variety not because of activity, but it’s being with someone new instead of the regular teacher they have all the time).
It’s amazing at how much the students still really enjoy participating in tag games. I always thought that they would view themselves as being “too good” for these “childish games.” Even when I told them we would be playing add-on tag, I had a little resistance from some of the students. After explaining them the rules, they still seemed a little slow to get it. However, just like yesterday, they just needed to get warmed up to the activity. After the first round, I asked the students what we are trying to learn from this. Some ideas were shot around and some of the students said the obvious: teamwork and communication. I let them play another round using my rules. However, before the third round, I asked them, if you could change the game, how would you change it? One student said play the whole court and nobody disagreed with him, so that is what they did. After this round, we needed to move onto another activity. I had a few complainers because they wanted to continue playing this game. I wonder if they like it so much because it takes them back to their childhood days when they would run around and try tagging people.
The next activity was all aboard. Before we began that activity, I told the students that in the next 8 weeks, they would spend a lot of time developing relationships with their classmates and learning how to be comfortable around them. I said that this activity will teach you to be comfortable with your classmates because we will be getting really close together. Needless-to-say, there was a lot of chaos and no real teamwork from the students as well as them being immature. I pulled them apart and asked them a series of questions starting with “what do we have to do to be successful as a group Now you are working as a team trying to reach the same goal, what do you need to do?” After a few ideas being shot around, they finally came up with teamwork and communication again. This time I asked them, “What do teams usually have?” Responses included captains, coaches, and leaders. I said “Who is going to step up and be a leader.” Immediately a few hands were shot into the air. One student was like “Pick me” while others were pointing to other students in the class. I responded, “I will not pick a leader, but if you want to be a leader, you have to reveal yourself to the class.
We continued into partner leads and partner falls. These activities are meant to build trust in each other. I asked them this and they responded with trust. I said, “I know we talked about creating a classroom that was safe for you as students. Is it important that you trust your classmates? This is what I am trying to teach you; to trust in your classmates, respecting them, and cooperating with them. If you can’t trust your class, then what I am trying to do with you just isn’t going to work.”
At the end of the class, I showed them the poster that I made for the class stating the rules and consequences for making those rules. I told them that they needed to sign it and by doing so, they were agreeing to follow the rules and consequences we set up as a class. They applauded me for doing their poster for them. I don’t know what the applause was all about, but it was nice to receive it. I also gave them a homework assignment in which they had to write down the 3 things they believed they learned from the class today. While many students were verbal during the class when I asked them questions, I want to hear from the other students who are too shy to speak up in the class and think that this is a good way to do so. I think that they got the general concepts of what I was trying to teach them, but still want to see if any student saw it in a different light. I hope they remember to do it. :)
At the very end of the day, I walked into the portable for advisory. As I walked in, the one boys sitting by the door said, “Hey aren’t you the P.E. chick?” I said, “Excuse me?” He just looked at me. I said, “You don’t refer to me as a chick. I am a girl and your teacher. You can refer to me as your P.E. teacher. I don’t want you to refer to me as chick again.” My cooperating teacher just smiled and said, “That’s right.” The student just sat there silently. Students these days just seem to not have any respect for their teachers or even their peers for that matter. I know it’s the dialect and language of this area, but they can still learn how to respect one another and those who are older than them.
Having my colleague here is really helpful and facilitates my teaching because we are going through similar things together. However, sometimes I wonder if it is taking away and hindering my relationship with my cooperating teacher. I feel as if I am relying on him too much rather than her. We haven’t done a lot of talking about teaching and how she experiences things like the way my last cooperating teacher and I did. I need to try to get out of this little comfort zone I am in with my colleague being here and start conversing with my cooperating teacher. I think that will make things go a little smoother and lessen the tensions between all of us.
Today, I told the one morning class and a few students in the second that I understand what they are feeling. The students are bored with Tae-Bo and they don’t like participating in it. I said to them “I know where you are coming from because there are times where I get bored myself with doing the same tape all day long with the other classes, but just do me one favor. You only have to do this one more time (Friday), so please give me your best effort. Then after this week, you don’t have to worry about doing it again. At this, I got a little bit more participation from the students, but it was still like pulling teeth. At the very end, I addressed the whole class and said “If you have me for next rotation, you will have more fun and like what we do.” I don’t want to discredit my cooperating teacher by saying this, but I wanted to provide the students with a little bit of optimism and hope for future P.E. classes. I will have to see if they do well on Friday.
While the students were getting changed for the class, I heard my cooperating teacher say, you can’t change in the bathroom. Curiously, I asked the teacher why. She explained to me that the students are not allowed to change in the bathroom or back where the showers are. I was completely taken aback by this. She further explained that they had that rule set in place so that there wouldn’t be forty girls changing in the stalls and the showers. I still don’t understand the rule. She said that some 6th graders will try this, but by the time they are in 8th grade, it doesn’t matter to them anyway. There are some pretty big girls who just don’t feel comfortable changing in front of people. I know if it were me, I would still continue to change in the bathroom or shower stall. At this time during a girl’s life, the last thing that she wants to worry about is if somebody is looking at her while changing and making judgments on her body. I know how they feel, I used to be that girl.
At the beginning of the third class, I had one girl walk up to me and we just started talking. During that conversation, she had mentioned that she was glad I was teaching the class now. “Why do you say that?” I replied. “Because you’re cool and we do more fun stuff,” she responded. “Haha okay, but why is it that you were one of the ones who complained about doing the boring work (paperwork).” At this she didn’t respond and we walked into class. Maybe these students are seeing what we are trying to do with them. Maybe she didn’t respond because she couldn’t fully express why she liked the class a little better than with my cooperating teacher. Then again, students seem to like having student teachers more and I think it’s because we offer a variety (I say variety not because of activity, but it’s being with someone new instead of the regular teacher they have all the time).
It’s amazing at how much the students still really enjoy participating in tag games. I always thought that they would view themselves as being “too good” for these “childish games.” Even when I told them we would be playing add-on tag, I had a little resistance from some of the students. After explaining them the rules, they still seemed a little slow to get it. However, just like yesterday, they just needed to get warmed up to the activity. After the first round, I asked the students what we are trying to learn from this. Some ideas were shot around and some of the students said the obvious: teamwork and communication. I let them play another round using my rules. However, before the third round, I asked them, if you could change the game, how would you change it? One student said play the whole court and nobody disagreed with him, so that is what they did. After this round, we needed to move onto another activity. I had a few complainers because they wanted to continue playing this game. I wonder if they like it so much because it takes them back to their childhood days when they would run around and try tagging people.
The next activity was all aboard. Before we began that activity, I told the students that in the next 8 weeks, they would spend a lot of time developing relationships with their classmates and learning how to be comfortable around them. I said that this activity will teach you to be comfortable with your classmates because we will be getting really close together. Needless-to-say, there was a lot of chaos and no real teamwork from the students as well as them being immature. I pulled them apart and asked them a series of questions starting with “what do we have to do to be successful as a group Now you are working as a team trying to reach the same goal, what do you need to do?” After a few ideas being shot around, they finally came up with teamwork and communication again. This time I asked them, “What do teams usually have?” Responses included captains, coaches, and leaders. I said “Who is going to step up and be a leader.” Immediately a few hands were shot into the air. One student was like “Pick me” while others were pointing to other students in the class. I responded, “I will not pick a leader, but if you want to be a leader, you have to reveal yourself to the class.
We continued into partner leads and partner falls. These activities are meant to build trust in each other. I asked them this and they responded with trust. I said, “I know we talked about creating a classroom that was safe for you as students. Is it important that you trust your classmates? This is what I am trying to teach you; to trust in your classmates, respecting them, and cooperating with them. If you can’t trust your class, then what I am trying to do with you just isn’t going to work.”
At the end of the class, I showed them the poster that I made for the class stating the rules and consequences for making those rules. I told them that they needed to sign it and by doing so, they were agreeing to follow the rules and consequences we set up as a class. They applauded me for doing their poster for them. I don’t know what the applause was all about, but it was nice to receive it. I also gave them a homework assignment in which they had to write down the 3 things they believed they learned from the class today. While many students were verbal during the class when I asked them questions, I want to hear from the other students who are too shy to speak up in the class and think that this is a good way to do so. I think that they got the general concepts of what I was trying to teach them, but still want to see if any student saw it in a different light. I hope they remember to do it. :)
At the very end of the day, I walked into the portable for advisory. As I walked in, the one boys sitting by the door said, “Hey aren’t you the P.E. chick?” I said, “Excuse me?” He just looked at me. I said, “You don’t refer to me as a chick. I am a girl and your teacher. You can refer to me as your P.E. teacher. I don’t want you to refer to me as chick again.” My cooperating teacher just smiled and said, “That’s right.” The student just sat there silently. Students these days just seem to not have any respect for their teachers or even their peers for that matter. I know it’s the dialect and language of this area, but they can still learn how to respect one another and those who are older than them.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Day 7...Taking Back Our Communities (3/9/10)
I think that the teachers are so resistant to what we are doing because they feel threatened. This is a whole new process that they are being introduced to and they don’t understand just yet as to why we are doing what we are doing. I think they feel threatened because there is somebody there every day observing us student teachers. They probably think that they are being watched and evaluated as well. I just hope that by the end of this student teaching placement, I can at least spark an interest in these cooperating teachers to see that this process does work. I don’t know if this will be possible because I think they are so rooted in their traditional views and ways of teaching, but anything is possible. I know that I can pray for them to help them see that what they are doing just isn’t working for the kids.
Why can’t the other teachers do this with us? I know that they are busy and it’s nice to have student teachers to take over the class, but they are supposed to be in there with us. I think if they were it would alleviate some of the problems with the resistance from them. If they were to see what is happening and maybe take a more engaging role in this process, they could see that it works.
Our cooperating teachers can hate and be resistant as they want, but at the end of the day, the students are leaving with smiles on their faces. This could be a direct result of what we are trying to accomplish with them or it could just be a casual greeting response. The students are still learning something in this process. I had one student come up to me and say, “You just gave me a great idea of a game I can play with my friends at a birthday party.” They can be learning either the concepts (teamwork, trust, and communication) or they could just be learning how to do that activity, but whatever it is, at least they are learning. Here is this girl who was taught something and is now going to go back home and try it with her friends. That to me is why I am teaching what I am; so the students can apply it to other parts of their life.
The first class continued with their Tae-Bo and walk/runs. Today I started picking up my pace a little bit so the students would pick up their intensity as well. I tell the students that if they are behind me by the time we finish, they have to do an extra lap. Granted, my pace is pretty slow compared to some of the students and I try to make sure that I am not going too fast for the slowest person in the class. I wanted to provide the students with a challenge and so far it seems to be working. They did well during the video, this class always does.
As the girls were leaving the locker room and waiting for the bell, I stopped to talk to a few about P.E. for next year. One girl responded, “I am not taking P.E. next year because the rotations are boring.” I told them that I will ask them that question after I get done teaching them. “But miss, you are an awesome coach.” I would really like to know what they are basing this statement off of. Is it because I am out there doing the activities with them or did they just say that because I was asking them questions about P.E.?
As the students were leaving, my colleague and I continued to meet them at the door. I said goodbye to one of the students and called her by name. Her response was quite comical. She said, “You know my name!” She got excited over the fact that I remembered her name. I think this is one of the things that many teachers should do. We are always making an effort to great all the students at the door and when they are exiting. We are not so wrapped up in ourselves as teachers and I think that by doing this; we have gained a lot of respect from the students.
In between the first and second class, one of the cooperating teachers asked “How do you assess students? I don’t like what you are doing. If you had to give a grade right now, how would you do that?” As of right now, we can grade students on participation, but he had to right back in my face saying “You can’t just do participation.” I understand that all of P.E. can’t be based upon participation. This teacher does a lot of his assessment through skill and what he can see the students doing. Right now, we are assessing the students cognitive ability, something that can’t be seen too well unless the students are speaking. It only takes two weeks for us to find out how the students function and experience P.E. and create a safe classroom environment. I believe that we can sacrifice that time of visual assessment to better assess student learning across the board and in the future.
For the second class, we had the adapted P.E. students. I really love working with them. They can brighten any one of my sad days. We played bocce ball with them. That was a lot of fun. Sometimes I wonder if we could provide these students with a curriculum just like any other class. I know that when I was a senior in high school and helping the P.E. teacher with the adapted class that she taught, we never did the same activity two days in a row, unless it was swimming. I was just wondering if this is what P.E. teachers who are certified to teach adapted do or if they follow a set curriculum. I know we have to meet IEPs with these students and there is a lot of variety that we can provide them, but I have yet to see an adapted program in which the students followed a curriculum.
After this class was over (we only do it for 45 minutes), I gather my things and head to the desk in the gym. During this time, the other teacher has a class in there. I can’t believe how lazy she is in her teaching style. I have yet to see her give any type of instruction to the students. She is the type of teacher who says “Here’s a ball. Go play.” While the students are participating in their activity, she is typing away at her computer. Is she not concerned about safety? She does occasionally turn to watch for a little bit, but she never consistently is monitoring the kids. She also plays music for them. I understand that kids want up to date and more modern day music. However, is there no censorship for school? I know it is stuff that they listen to outside of school, but still. What have schools evolved into to allow teachers to play this type of music (there isn’t swearing, but it’s all about sex anymore)?
The girls are noticing how they are being treated compared to the guys and it is always based on what the boys want. In the last class we had, one girl said, “I don’t think it’s fair that the boys get to play football and basketball, and we have to do a more structured curriculum.” Today we talked about classroom environments and how this one differs from the guys’ class. The girls said that “other girls hold grudges for a very long time. All the guys do is throw down and then the next day they are best friends.” In regards to them being treated differently, they also said that the guys don’t get yelled at or in trouble as much as they do. It is quite obvious that the teachers are treating the students differently based upon their gender.
As well as talking about classroom environments, we also created class rules and consequences. When talking about the consequences, my cooperating teacher had to pipe in her own opinion. She said to the girls that it’s good that we are creating consequences for this class, but there are consequences that the school has already set in place. She basically nullified everything that I tried to do today and discredited me in front of the whole class. I couldn’t believe that she would have done that (actually I can).
Today with my last class, I started the students out with Add-On Tag. After giving them instructions, I thought this was going to be a disaster. The students don’t look like they are too interested in what they are about to do or they just don’t understand. However, it turned out to be pretty good; so good that the students kept asking to play more of it and in a larger playing area. However, we needed to create rules for the class, but I told them that as soon as we did that, we could play one more time. It just so happened that they just needed to warm up to the activity (which is true with about everything we do).
I have noticed that with this class, I seem to turn my back to the Spanish speakers. They tend to sit all together on the same side of the room. Whenever I gather the students back into a larger group to discuss and debrief, I am always asking the other students questions, but rarely do I get an answer from them or ask them a specific question. I don’t know why I had to resort back to being backwards and shy when talking to them in their language. I know I am not the best at it, but I only try it with a couple of students. Even at that, I have created a relationship with one of the other girls in the class in that if I don’t know how to translate something, she does it for me. I need to get over this fear because if I don’t, then I am not reaching all the students.
It is so hard to do adventure education with half the class missing because when they come back, they will have missed an important part of our process in working together as a team, building trust in one another, learning how to communicate, and creating a classroom in which the students feel comfortable and safe. What their classmates are learning while they are gone are invaluable things. Regardless, when those students return to the class, I hope the dynamics are not too disrupted.
I mentioned a while back about being overqualified to teach in any school across the nation. However, as I think about it more, it’s kind of a scary thought. Even though we are doing something revolutionary to change the way people think about physical education and the extensive knowledge and experience we have gained from this process, I am afraid that we might be too overqualified for some school districts. Sometimes I think that if a school sees the things that we have done, they would be hesitant in hiring us because they don’t want their program to change. Then again, some schools might be willing to accept the change. It can go either way.
I end with this parting thought. We have to bring the community back together.
Everyone has their own agenda and it goes back to that individuality that society is forcing upon us. When talking to the students about games that they should learn on the playground, they have no idea what we are talking about. It could be that they didn’t have access to the playground or they just weren’t exposed to it in this area. However, the playgrounds that envelope the schools in the city are forbidden after school is over. How is that fair and just for the students? I know that there is a concern for the equipment (that is why there are no nets on the outside basketball nets) and children safety, but they are on public property because the school belongs to that community. Why can’t we let children play on school playgrounds? I am tired of hearing about liability. That is what seems to be the biggest thing these days which influence the way people do things. Why can’t we get the community to come back together? Is it too far gone to even make a change?
Oh. And one last thing: You just can’t do the human knot with an odd number of people :).
Why can’t the other teachers do this with us? I know that they are busy and it’s nice to have student teachers to take over the class, but they are supposed to be in there with us. I think if they were it would alleviate some of the problems with the resistance from them. If they were to see what is happening and maybe take a more engaging role in this process, they could see that it works.
Our cooperating teachers can hate and be resistant as they want, but at the end of the day, the students are leaving with smiles on their faces. This could be a direct result of what we are trying to accomplish with them or it could just be a casual greeting response. The students are still learning something in this process. I had one student come up to me and say, “You just gave me a great idea of a game I can play with my friends at a birthday party.” They can be learning either the concepts (teamwork, trust, and communication) or they could just be learning how to do that activity, but whatever it is, at least they are learning. Here is this girl who was taught something and is now going to go back home and try it with her friends. That to me is why I am teaching what I am; so the students can apply it to other parts of their life.
The first class continued with their Tae-Bo and walk/runs. Today I started picking up my pace a little bit so the students would pick up their intensity as well. I tell the students that if they are behind me by the time we finish, they have to do an extra lap. Granted, my pace is pretty slow compared to some of the students and I try to make sure that I am not going too fast for the slowest person in the class. I wanted to provide the students with a challenge and so far it seems to be working. They did well during the video, this class always does.
As the girls were leaving the locker room and waiting for the bell, I stopped to talk to a few about P.E. for next year. One girl responded, “I am not taking P.E. next year because the rotations are boring.” I told them that I will ask them that question after I get done teaching them. “But miss, you are an awesome coach.” I would really like to know what they are basing this statement off of. Is it because I am out there doing the activities with them or did they just say that because I was asking them questions about P.E.?
As the students were leaving, my colleague and I continued to meet them at the door. I said goodbye to one of the students and called her by name. Her response was quite comical. She said, “You know my name!” She got excited over the fact that I remembered her name. I think this is one of the things that many teachers should do. We are always making an effort to great all the students at the door and when they are exiting. We are not so wrapped up in ourselves as teachers and I think that by doing this; we have gained a lot of respect from the students.
In between the first and second class, one of the cooperating teachers asked “How do you assess students? I don’t like what you are doing. If you had to give a grade right now, how would you do that?” As of right now, we can grade students on participation, but he had to right back in my face saying “You can’t just do participation.” I understand that all of P.E. can’t be based upon participation. This teacher does a lot of his assessment through skill and what he can see the students doing. Right now, we are assessing the students cognitive ability, something that can’t be seen too well unless the students are speaking. It only takes two weeks for us to find out how the students function and experience P.E. and create a safe classroom environment. I believe that we can sacrifice that time of visual assessment to better assess student learning across the board and in the future.
For the second class, we had the adapted P.E. students. I really love working with them. They can brighten any one of my sad days. We played bocce ball with them. That was a lot of fun. Sometimes I wonder if we could provide these students with a curriculum just like any other class. I know that when I was a senior in high school and helping the P.E. teacher with the adapted class that she taught, we never did the same activity two days in a row, unless it was swimming. I was just wondering if this is what P.E. teachers who are certified to teach adapted do or if they follow a set curriculum. I know we have to meet IEPs with these students and there is a lot of variety that we can provide them, but I have yet to see an adapted program in which the students followed a curriculum.
After this class was over (we only do it for 45 minutes), I gather my things and head to the desk in the gym. During this time, the other teacher has a class in there. I can’t believe how lazy she is in her teaching style. I have yet to see her give any type of instruction to the students. She is the type of teacher who says “Here’s a ball. Go play.” While the students are participating in their activity, she is typing away at her computer. Is she not concerned about safety? She does occasionally turn to watch for a little bit, but she never consistently is monitoring the kids. She also plays music for them. I understand that kids want up to date and more modern day music. However, is there no censorship for school? I know it is stuff that they listen to outside of school, but still. What have schools evolved into to allow teachers to play this type of music (there isn’t swearing, but it’s all about sex anymore)?
The girls are noticing how they are being treated compared to the guys and it is always based on what the boys want. In the last class we had, one girl said, “I don’t think it’s fair that the boys get to play football and basketball, and we have to do a more structured curriculum.” Today we talked about classroom environments and how this one differs from the guys’ class. The girls said that “other girls hold grudges for a very long time. All the guys do is throw down and then the next day they are best friends.” In regards to them being treated differently, they also said that the guys don’t get yelled at or in trouble as much as they do. It is quite obvious that the teachers are treating the students differently based upon their gender.
As well as talking about classroom environments, we also created class rules and consequences. When talking about the consequences, my cooperating teacher had to pipe in her own opinion. She said to the girls that it’s good that we are creating consequences for this class, but there are consequences that the school has already set in place. She basically nullified everything that I tried to do today and discredited me in front of the whole class. I couldn’t believe that she would have done that (actually I can).
Today with my last class, I started the students out with Add-On Tag. After giving them instructions, I thought this was going to be a disaster. The students don’t look like they are too interested in what they are about to do or they just don’t understand. However, it turned out to be pretty good; so good that the students kept asking to play more of it and in a larger playing area. However, we needed to create rules for the class, but I told them that as soon as we did that, we could play one more time. It just so happened that they just needed to warm up to the activity (which is true with about everything we do).
I have noticed that with this class, I seem to turn my back to the Spanish speakers. They tend to sit all together on the same side of the room. Whenever I gather the students back into a larger group to discuss and debrief, I am always asking the other students questions, but rarely do I get an answer from them or ask them a specific question. I don’t know why I had to resort back to being backwards and shy when talking to them in their language. I know I am not the best at it, but I only try it with a couple of students. Even at that, I have created a relationship with one of the other girls in the class in that if I don’t know how to translate something, she does it for me. I need to get over this fear because if I don’t, then I am not reaching all the students.
It is so hard to do adventure education with half the class missing because when they come back, they will have missed an important part of our process in working together as a team, building trust in one another, learning how to communicate, and creating a classroom in which the students feel comfortable and safe. What their classmates are learning while they are gone are invaluable things. Regardless, when those students return to the class, I hope the dynamics are not too disrupted.
I mentioned a while back about being overqualified to teach in any school across the nation. However, as I think about it more, it’s kind of a scary thought. Even though we are doing something revolutionary to change the way people think about physical education and the extensive knowledge and experience we have gained from this process, I am afraid that we might be too overqualified for some school districts. Sometimes I think that if a school sees the things that we have done, they would be hesitant in hiring us because they don’t want their program to change. Then again, some schools might be willing to accept the change. It can go either way.
I end with this parting thought. We have to bring the community back together.
Everyone has their own agenda and it goes back to that individuality that society is forcing upon us. When talking to the students about games that they should learn on the playground, they have no idea what we are talking about. It could be that they didn’t have access to the playground or they just weren’t exposed to it in this area. However, the playgrounds that envelope the schools in the city are forbidden after school is over. How is that fair and just for the students? I know that there is a concern for the equipment (that is why there are no nets on the outside basketball nets) and children safety, but they are on public property because the school belongs to that community. Why can’t we let children play on school playgrounds? I am tired of hearing about liability. That is what seems to be the biggest thing these days which influence the way people do things. Why can’t we get the community to come back together? Is it too far gone to even make a change?
Oh. And one last thing: You just can’t do the human knot with an odd number of people :).
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Day 6....Humbling Myself and Understanding Why I'm Here (3/8/10)
Today is the beginning of my second week. I am looking forward to getting to know the students more, developing better relationships with them, and actually beginning to teach my sampler lessons to the students. We still have a few things to get out of the way such as creating class rules and talking about classroom environments(honors class).
Today was just an ordinary day. Nothing really happened that is worth noting, but I will write about each of the classes.
My first class was the same old, same old. We continued with Tae-Bo. However, the weather was crappy so instead of doing the walk/run, we went to the weight room after the class completed the Tae-Bo video. I have come to realize that my cooperating teacher just yells too much at the students. “You shouldn’t be talking.” “Pull your hair back.” To me, these are very minuscule things that don’t really need to be frowned upon. The students love the social aspect of the class, therefore they will talk. For girls at this age, a lot of what they do is based upon their looks. Some of the girls have such a resistance to the rule of pulling their hair back. My philosophy is that if the student can participate safely regardless of their hair being down or up, then what does it matter? Anywho, this class just does not like to do Tae-Bo and who can blame them. They do the same video every day. It’s boring.
After the Tae-Bo video, we took the kids over to the weight room for the last half of the class. The students have the basic ability to lift weights. However, they need to learn how to spot, do certain exercises, and how to be safe in the class. Near the very end of class, I taught a group of boys how to use a bench and a bar (bench press). After this, I noticed that I was spending too much time with certain students. I find myself gravitating towards the students whose names I know. I am trying to get to know all their names, it is just a long process. It would be easy to be intimidated by the amount of names that I have to get to know. However, when looking at it, I have the majority of students’ names down and it is actually not so hard to do. It just takes a little time and effort on my part.
The beginning of the second class was quite interesting. I have been really getting to know the students and noticed that as soon as the one boy walked out of the locker room, he was not in a good mood. In the beginning of the class, during the run, he was walking with me. Throughout the length of the walk, I was persistent in having him tell me what was going on. He refused the first time saying it wasn’t a big deal, but after I said “Okay, well I am here if you want to talk about it.” Eventually, before it was over he told me that he was upset that the teacher got on his case for not bringing his clothes. “He was yelling at me like I do this all the time and I don’t.” I empathized with the student, but he is one of those students who looks for attention. I still listened though, that will never change regardless of who the student is. I just told him to shake it off and it will be alright. However, as we finished our lap together, the teacher started yelling at him again saying that he didn’t do his lap. I looked at the teacher and said that he did and I finished with him. Apparently it wasn’t to the teacher’s standards, but instead of listening to the teacher continue to yell at him, the student just said “Fine. I’ll just do another one.” As I passed the teacher, a student was holding the door for us. The teacher made a comment about the student (one that I can’t exactly remember, but it was bad enough for me to think, “Are you serious.”) After the teacher said it, he followed it by saying “what a joke.” There was one student who witnessed all this go down and chuckled and said “yea” when the teacher made those comments. I couldn’t believe this teacher would do this in the presence of a fellow classmate of this younger boy.
The third class finished up the co-creating lesson today with creating class rules. The class was really low key as far as activity and discussion go. We created rules and consequences for those rules and the students seemed to agree with them. At the end of class, I had them do the human knot activity and one of the hula hoop activities. Let me tell you! These students have a problem holding onto each other’s hands. I know that comes with the age, but it was just funny to watch them. Some students would hold onto the wrist or shirt of the other person. However, this was really only the problem when it came to a boy and girl holding hands or when a boy had to hold another boy’s hand. I didn’t see this behavior whenever a girl had to hold another girl’s hand. As I left this class, I thought to myself “Do the students notice what we are trying to do?” Sometimes I feel like what I am doing for the students doesn’t matter to them. I think that I am just early in the stages of this process to notice the changes in the students.
At the end of the day, as I was biding the students a farewell at the door, I pulled one student aside, one who was not participating and engaging in off-task behavior during the last class. I had said to him that I wanted him to come to class next time ready to participate and that I expected better from him as a student. He replied, “They were making fun of me right in front of you!” This comment totally floored me. I couldn’t believe that I had missed it. As part of our discussion the other day, the students said that the teacher doesn’t notice it in response to the question “What does the teacher do to stop bullying?” I have always told myself that I will not let those things slide, but here I was with this student telling me that I completely missed it when it was right in front of my face. I felt so small at this point. I told him I would do a better job next time in trying to notice it, but “you have to bring it to my attention if I don’t notice it right away.”
With all of the classes, I have given them the task of creating a class name. With this, I hope to have the students also see that not only am I giving them the sense of ownership in the class, but also a sense of identity. As labeled on paper, it just reads Class 3 – Period 1, for example. Having a class name, I believe, puts the students under the same umbrella. We usually associate names with large groups as being teams. I want the students to see that they are part of a team and the peers that surround them are their teammates. This way, students can associate themselves with a team and have a sense of belonging. Maybe they will even be more responsible for their peers knowing that as a team, we don’t want to let one another down.
I may not be physically exhausted at the end of the day like I was at my elementary placement, but I sure am mentally tired. These students can zap the energy right out of you and make you view everything in a negative way, but then again we have those days in which you leave the school feeling you can conquer the world because you feel empowered by the students. You have those days in which everything finally clicks and you see the reasons as to why you are here.
Today was just an ordinary day. Nothing really happened that is worth noting, but I will write about each of the classes.
My first class was the same old, same old. We continued with Tae-Bo. However, the weather was crappy so instead of doing the walk/run, we went to the weight room after the class completed the Tae-Bo video. I have come to realize that my cooperating teacher just yells too much at the students. “You shouldn’t be talking.” “Pull your hair back.” To me, these are very minuscule things that don’t really need to be frowned upon. The students love the social aspect of the class, therefore they will talk. For girls at this age, a lot of what they do is based upon their looks. Some of the girls have such a resistance to the rule of pulling their hair back. My philosophy is that if the student can participate safely regardless of their hair being down or up, then what does it matter? Anywho, this class just does not like to do Tae-Bo and who can blame them. They do the same video every day. It’s boring.
After the Tae-Bo video, we took the kids over to the weight room for the last half of the class. The students have the basic ability to lift weights. However, they need to learn how to spot, do certain exercises, and how to be safe in the class. Near the very end of class, I taught a group of boys how to use a bench and a bar (bench press). After this, I noticed that I was spending too much time with certain students. I find myself gravitating towards the students whose names I know. I am trying to get to know all their names, it is just a long process. It would be easy to be intimidated by the amount of names that I have to get to know. However, when looking at it, I have the majority of students’ names down and it is actually not so hard to do. It just takes a little time and effort on my part.
The beginning of the second class was quite interesting. I have been really getting to know the students and noticed that as soon as the one boy walked out of the locker room, he was not in a good mood. In the beginning of the class, during the run, he was walking with me. Throughout the length of the walk, I was persistent in having him tell me what was going on. He refused the first time saying it wasn’t a big deal, but after I said “Okay, well I am here if you want to talk about it.” Eventually, before it was over he told me that he was upset that the teacher got on his case for not bringing his clothes. “He was yelling at me like I do this all the time and I don’t.” I empathized with the student, but he is one of those students who looks for attention. I still listened though, that will never change regardless of who the student is. I just told him to shake it off and it will be alright. However, as we finished our lap together, the teacher started yelling at him again saying that he didn’t do his lap. I looked at the teacher and said that he did and I finished with him. Apparently it wasn’t to the teacher’s standards, but instead of listening to the teacher continue to yell at him, the student just said “Fine. I’ll just do another one.” As I passed the teacher, a student was holding the door for us. The teacher made a comment about the student (one that I can’t exactly remember, but it was bad enough for me to think, “Are you serious.”) After the teacher said it, he followed it by saying “what a joke.” There was one student who witnessed all this go down and chuckled and said “yea” when the teacher made those comments. I couldn’t believe this teacher would do this in the presence of a fellow classmate of this younger boy.
The third class finished up the co-creating lesson today with creating class rules. The class was really low key as far as activity and discussion go. We created rules and consequences for those rules and the students seemed to agree with them. At the end of class, I had them do the human knot activity and one of the hula hoop activities. Let me tell you! These students have a problem holding onto each other’s hands. I know that comes with the age, but it was just funny to watch them. Some students would hold onto the wrist or shirt of the other person. However, this was really only the problem when it came to a boy and girl holding hands or when a boy had to hold another boy’s hand. I didn’t see this behavior whenever a girl had to hold another girl’s hand. As I left this class, I thought to myself “Do the students notice what we are trying to do?” Sometimes I feel like what I am doing for the students doesn’t matter to them. I think that I am just early in the stages of this process to notice the changes in the students.
At the end of the day, as I was biding the students a farewell at the door, I pulled one student aside, one who was not participating and engaging in off-task behavior during the last class. I had said to him that I wanted him to come to class next time ready to participate and that I expected better from him as a student. He replied, “They were making fun of me right in front of you!” This comment totally floored me. I couldn’t believe that I had missed it. As part of our discussion the other day, the students said that the teacher doesn’t notice it in response to the question “What does the teacher do to stop bullying?” I have always told myself that I will not let those things slide, but here I was with this student telling me that I completely missed it when it was right in front of my face. I felt so small at this point. I told him I would do a better job next time in trying to notice it, but “you have to bring it to my attention if I don’t notice it right away.”
With all of the classes, I have given them the task of creating a class name. With this, I hope to have the students also see that not only am I giving them the sense of ownership in the class, but also a sense of identity. As labeled on paper, it just reads Class 3 – Period 1, for example. Having a class name, I believe, puts the students under the same umbrella. We usually associate names with large groups as being teams. I want the students to see that they are part of a team and the peers that surround them are their teammates. This way, students can associate themselves with a team and have a sense of belonging. Maybe they will even be more responsible for their peers knowing that as a team, we don’t want to let one another down.
I may not be physically exhausted at the end of the day like I was at my elementary placement, but I sure am mentally tired. These students can zap the energy right out of you and make you view everything in a negative way, but then again we have those days in which you leave the school feeling you can conquer the world because you feel empowered by the students. You have those days in which everything finally clicks and you see the reasons as to why you are here.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Day 5...Remembering Who We Once Were (3/5/10)
Woot Woot! I made it to Friday. I have officially made it through my first week with the middle school students and what a week it was. There was a huge learning curve that I experienced over the past 5 days. There were some really good times and then there were not so good times. There were times where I thought that I couldn’t do this; I can’t do this. On the other hand, there were times where I thought that I can see myself doing this for a very long time.
It would be easy to fall into the program these teachers are displaying. It would be easy to fall into the lazy routine of picking units and teaching them. They have settled into a routine that will take hard work and effort to come out of. However, my colleague and I are too thorough and educated to do so. One of my main concerns is that I will settle like they have. I would like to think that because of my pursuit of excellence, this will never happen, but who knows what things are going to be like in 10 years.
It has become known to me that our cooperating teachers do not really like the other teacher. Apparently she doesn’t do her job and I would have to agree. She is the one who said that she likes to listen to her iPod when the students are participating in P.E. Out of all three teachers. One is an okay teacher, but she is yelling at the students all the time. One is just lazy and the last one just doesn’t care.
These teachers are disengaged from their students. The dynamics of teaching change at each school level. In the elementary school, the main focus is on family and community. However, here at the middle school and high school, it’s all about individuality. Here, it’s all about ourselves and what we can do for #1. We are tucked away from the rest of the school even though we are still attached. It is definitely different than elementary school. The first week I pretty much met all the teachers and knew what grade they taught. Here, I have yet to meet any other teachers from this school. I know I should go out of my way to meet them, but I am so backward and shy that I will just wait to be around them than to go seek them out.
There is a boy’s basketball game later this evening. They are so serious about basketball here that even all the kids are always asking to play basketball. P.E. is not allowed in the gym because they are cleaning and waxing the floor. However, when it is time for a girl’s basketball game, this special treatment is not showed to them. The girls are even the ones who say it’s not fair. It’s only because of who the boy’s basketball coach is.
It is quite apparent that we are overly qualified to go into any physical education teaching position and teach right now. The only real thing that we lack is the experience. Our teacher education program has prepared us in a way that I don’t think others across the nation are being prepared the same way. What we are doing is revolutionary. Nobody else in the country (or very few programs) is learning what we have been learning. They are still stuck in the traditional ways of teaching (i.e. choosing units for the students).
What is going on in the world today that all these students know is to resort to violence to solve their problems. This is definitely becoming a Godless generation. If these students were taught to have morals and values, maybe they would find other ways to liberate their anger. Heck, maybe they wouldn’t be as temperamental or as quick to become angry. It seems as though the students know no other way to solve their problems other than beating the daylights out of the person causing them the problems. They don’t know how to be civil and use problem solving strategies.
The first class of the day is still doing Tae-Bo and the 15 minute walk/run. The students are doing the stuff without complaining but the walk/run is so boring. It’s no wonder the kids don’t want to participate in these activities. When talking with the students after they make a comment about the activity, I have to be sure to watch what I say because I don’t want to be going against my cooperating teacher. While I want my students to think that I am the better teacher, I know that will come with the things that I do and how I act towards them. I don’t want my words to be the deciding factor. Why say with words what you can do with actions?
In the second class, my eighth grade honors class, we only had 8 girls. I did adventure education the whole class period. In the beginning of the class, the girl’s were asking why they couldn’t be with the boys today, but by the end of class, I heard a girl say “This was the best class ever” and no one seemed to disagree with that statement. Some of the activities included group juggling (name game), human knot, partner falls, partner leads, all aboard, team seating, and hoop games. In the group juggling, I asked them several questions that they needed to answer every time they got the ball. The questions included “What do you like about school?” “What would you dislike about school?” “What would you change about school?” Most of the responses included events and activities outside of school and being with (like) or without (dislike/change) friends. Needless to say, it went really really well. I had a lot of fun with this class and I believe that they understood the concepts that I was trying to teach them: teamwork, communication, and leadership.
The last class also did participate in group juggling. This class is like pulling teeth. I then had them do the co-creating class environment. After doing the co-creating, I gathered them back in and talked to them for a little bit about who I am and what I want to be as a teacher. I hope that by doing this will help me gain a level of respect and trust from the students. I also want them to feel comfortable around me. I guess you could say that in the back of my mind, this was also influenced because I want the students to like me. I told them that “I don’t want to be the kind of teacher that yells at you. I see that you get that a lot already. So you have to let me know when you think I am yelling at you too much, but do know that there will be times that I have to yell at you. Keep in mind that I am not yelling at you as a person, but the behaviors that you are doing.” I proceeded to tell them that “I don’t think students are down here and the teacher is up here. I think that we are on the same level. I am not the only one who teaches in this room. You teach me how to be a better teacher. I want to do this with you. I don’t want to pick an activity and you have to do it because I am the teacher. I want you to be able to voice your opinion in this class.” (I also said this to the honors class, but will have to say it again because half the class wasn’t there.)
At the very end of the day, some of the students had an assembly. I guess that every Friday they do this and it’s a reward for the students who do their work for the week. Other students have to go to advisory and tutoring (or something like that).
We were in charge of seating and watching over the students. It was quite a spectacle to see how assemblies work on the other side of the fence. A lot of the beginning moments were spent trying to get the students to quiet down and pay attention. However, the projector and volume wasn’t working as it should, so obviously the kids are going to be talking and being off task. My colleague and I sat at the top of the bleachers so we could see all the students and talked about a few things. I looked over at him and said “I think these teachers forget that they were kids once.” It was amazing to watch all the other teachers yell at the students. This to me just makes me lose respect for the teachers themselves. I mean, come on. We are talking about middle school students. You tell them not to do something, and they are going to do it to spite you. I just wish these teachers would remember that they did the same things when they were in middle school and be able to reason with the students; not always get on the soapbox and yell at them. The one cooperating teacher does this thing with his eyes and it is just so stupid. He does it all the time and it doesn’t even faze the students anymore. They should feel bad seeing that it upsets us when they misbehave and think “Aw man. I just made the teacher mad.” I want my students to want to behave out of respect, not out of fear.
Can’t wait for the next week to see what it will bring, but regardless of what it is, I know that the Lord has already provided me the strength to overcome any obstacle or barrier to teaching and learning. (Philippians 4:13)
It would be easy to fall into the program these teachers are displaying. It would be easy to fall into the lazy routine of picking units and teaching them. They have settled into a routine that will take hard work and effort to come out of. However, my colleague and I are too thorough and educated to do so. One of my main concerns is that I will settle like they have. I would like to think that because of my pursuit of excellence, this will never happen, but who knows what things are going to be like in 10 years.
It has become known to me that our cooperating teachers do not really like the other teacher. Apparently she doesn’t do her job and I would have to agree. She is the one who said that she likes to listen to her iPod when the students are participating in P.E. Out of all three teachers. One is an okay teacher, but she is yelling at the students all the time. One is just lazy and the last one just doesn’t care.
These teachers are disengaged from their students. The dynamics of teaching change at each school level. In the elementary school, the main focus is on family and community. However, here at the middle school and high school, it’s all about individuality. Here, it’s all about ourselves and what we can do for #1. We are tucked away from the rest of the school even though we are still attached. It is definitely different than elementary school. The first week I pretty much met all the teachers and knew what grade they taught. Here, I have yet to meet any other teachers from this school. I know I should go out of my way to meet them, but I am so backward and shy that I will just wait to be around them than to go seek them out.
There is a boy’s basketball game later this evening. They are so serious about basketball here that even all the kids are always asking to play basketball. P.E. is not allowed in the gym because they are cleaning and waxing the floor. However, when it is time for a girl’s basketball game, this special treatment is not showed to them. The girls are even the ones who say it’s not fair. It’s only because of who the boy’s basketball coach is.
It is quite apparent that we are overly qualified to go into any physical education teaching position and teach right now. The only real thing that we lack is the experience. Our teacher education program has prepared us in a way that I don’t think others across the nation are being prepared the same way. What we are doing is revolutionary. Nobody else in the country (or very few programs) is learning what we have been learning. They are still stuck in the traditional ways of teaching (i.e. choosing units for the students).
What is going on in the world today that all these students know is to resort to violence to solve their problems. This is definitely becoming a Godless generation. If these students were taught to have morals and values, maybe they would find other ways to liberate their anger. Heck, maybe they wouldn’t be as temperamental or as quick to become angry. It seems as though the students know no other way to solve their problems other than beating the daylights out of the person causing them the problems. They don’t know how to be civil and use problem solving strategies.
The first class of the day is still doing Tae-Bo and the 15 minute walk/run. The students are doing the stuff without complaining but the walk/run is so boring. It’s no wonder the kids don’t want to participate in these activities. When talking with the students after they make a comment about the activity, I have to be sure to watch what I say because I don’t want to be going against my cooperating teacher. While I want my students to think that I am the better teacher, I know that will come with the things that I do and how I act towards them. I don’t want my words to be the deciding factor. Why say with words what you can do with actions?
In the second class, my eighth grade honors class, we only had 8 girls. I did adventure education the whole class period. In the beginning of the class, the girl’s were asking why they couldn’t be with the boys today, but by the end of class, I heard a girl say “This was the best class ever” and no one seemed to disagree with that statement. Some of the activities included group juggling (name game), human knot, partner falls, partner leads, all aboard, team seating, and hoop games. In the group juggling, I asked them several questions that they needed to answer every time they got the ball. The questions included “What do you like about school?” “What would you dislike about school?” “What would you change about school?” Most of the responses included events and activities outside of school and being with (like) or without (dislike/change) friends. Needless to say, it went really really well. I had a lot of fun with this class and I believe that they understood the concepts that I was trying to teach them: teamwork, communication, and leadership.
The last class also did participate in group juggling. This class is like pulling teeth. I then had them do the co-creating class environment. After doing the co-creating, I gathered them back in and talked to them for a little bit about who I am and what I want to be as a teacher. I hope that by doing this will help me gain a level of respect and trust from the students. I also want them to feel comfortable around me. I guess you could say that in the back of my mind, this was also influenced because I want the students to like me. I told them that “I don’t want to be the kind of teacher that yells at you. I see that you get that a lot already. So you have to let me know when you think I am yelling at you too much, but do know that there will be times that I have to yell at you. Keep in mind that I am not yelling at you as a person, but the behaviors that you are doing.” I proceeded to tell them that “I don’t think students are down here and the teacher is up here. I think that we are on the same level. I am not the only one who teaches in this room. You teach me how to be a better teacher. I want to do this with you. I don’t want to pick an activity and you have to do it because I am the teacher. I want you to be able to voice your opinion in this class.” (I also said this to the honors class, but will have to say it again because half the class wasn’t there.)
At the very end of the day, some of the students had an assembly. I guess that every Friday they do this and it’s a reward for the students who do their work for the week. Other students have to go to advisory and tutoring (or something like that).
We were in charge of seating and watching over the students. It was quite a spectacle to see how assemblies work on the other side of the fence. A lot of the beginning moments were spent trying to get the students to quiet down and pay attention. However, the projector and volume wasn’t working as it should, so obviously the kids are going to be talking and being off task. My colleague and I sat at the top of the bleachers so we could see all the students and talked about a few things. I looked over at him and said “I think these teachers forget that they were kids once.” It was amazing to watch all the other teachers yell at the students. This to me just makes me lose respect for the teachers themselves. I mean, come on. We are talking about middle school students. You tell them not to do something, and they are going to do it to spite you. I just wish these teachers would remember that they did the same things when they were in middle school and be able to reason with the students; not always get on the soapbox and yell at them. The one cooperating teacher does this thing with his eyes and it is just so stupid. He does it all the time and it doesn’t even faze the students anymore. They should feel bad seeing that it upsets us when they misbehave and think “Aw man. I just made the teacher mad.” I want my students to want to behave out of respect, not out of fear.
Can’t wait for the next week to see what it will bring, but regardless of what it is, I know that the Lord has already provided me the strength to overcome any obstacle or barrier to teaching and learning. (Philippians 4:13)
Friday, March 5, 2010
Day 4...Building Bridges (3/4/10)
Today was a beautiful day! The weather was really nice. We had sunny and cloudless skies with a small breeze that helped it from being overly hot.
We are building bridges with students and just like it takes some architects longer to build one bridge compared to another, it will take longer with some of the students. The students will both let you in their life immediately and be open with you or they will be reserved and you have to prove yourself as a teacher and friend before they feel comfortable around you. I have had some students come up and talk to me like they have known me forever and with others; it’s like pulling teeth for them to just say hi to you.
However, my colleague and I still stand at the doors at the beginning and end of every class to greet the students and wish them good days. I have seen the students be more open to saying hi to us throughout the day when we see them outside of class. I really like how they come up and give you a high five and a fist to say hello. Once one student does it and another student sees it, it starts a rippled effect. I just like how the students are becoming more comfortable with coming up to us instead of staying away because they don’t know us yet. I think that they see that we are very cordial and amicable and it helps them feel safe. That’s the type of atmosphere that we teachers need to be making; an environment in which the students feel emotionally and physically safe.
Even in advisory at the end of the day, I sat down with a group of girls and just talked to them. These are the times that I enjoy the most because it is not so stressful and I can open up with the students. The students got a chance to ask me any questions they want and the students get a chance to get to know you more. In return, the students feel more comfortable to open up to me because I was willing to do so for them. You need to be a little open with the students in order to create that community and that bond you want to have with them.
There was a substitute today for one of the teachers. When I sat down next to him, he said “So you want to be a P.E. coach?” I smiled and replied, “No sir. I want to be a P.E. teacher.” “You don’t want to be a coach then?” “Yes I do want to be a coach, but a teacher is different than a coach. They are separate entities.” It really bugs me that people think that being a P.E. coach and being a P.E. teacher are one in the same thing. This level of thinking and mentally is what gives physical education a bad reputation. P.E. teachers are teachers like anyone else. We teach to have the kids learn. Coaches, on the other hand, yes they teach skills, drills, and strategies, but they do so for competition and winning. Teachers teach so students can be lifelong learners of physical activity.
I was really active with the students today. Rinalldo and I began doing their lap with them. Then for my classes, when we do the walk/run, I go out and do it with them. Coming in for Tae-Bo, I still am participating like them and with them. I was walking around and telling some of the students who really hate Tae-Bo that I don’t understand why they hate it so much when their form is so good. The one girl just smiled and the other boy I said this to said, “No miss.” I repeated “Yes you are. You have better form than half the kids in this class” He smiled. I can really motivate the students to pick up the intensity of their participation. For example, the Tae-Bo video was doing kicking. I started walking around the class telling the students to kick me in the hand (just to show them that they can kick higher). I found that the students did better when I did this for them. Either that or they just really wanted a chance to kick the teacher.
My second class went really well too. There are 34 students and I can proudly boast that I know all their names. I just hope that I can remember them the next time they come in to class next week. Rinalldo and I ran with the students again. It really does motivate them to do more. We tell the students that if they finish after us, they have to do it again. However, we walk the first half and then slowly jog the second half. We just want to push them to do more instead of what they are already doing. I even jumped into the stretches and warming up with the students. One girl looked at me and gave me a smile and thumbs up as if she was congratulating me for participating with everyone. After we did the stretches and running, we came back in and were waiting for all the students to go to their classes. I stood on the basketball court and all these girls just started coming up and talking to me. I can see that they are starting to get comfortable with me being there. I really like that feeling and knowing that the students are opening up to me.
My supervising teacher told me today, “Don’t show them any fear. They can smell fear.” This was said before my third class which is the one that caused me tears the first day. If anything, I displayed an exuberance to be here again. It’s a new day. I thank God for putting me in this situation and giving me the strength to show up once again. I thank Him for putting me in a position to be such an influence in these students’ lives. Daniel 12:3 states that “those who teach others to live right will shine like stars forever and ever.” My job is to not fear teaching, but to teach others to live right. I am not just teaching students how to be physically active, but through my teaching, I plan to teach these students to develop the abilities to be compassionate, respectful, and understanding of others. I will be teaching these students to be better people and things that they will carry through them for a lifetime. Therefore, there is no reason for me to be afraid of going to each class, regardless of what happened during the previous one.
My third class was a lot better this time. One student came and asked me what we were doing. I told him it was similar to what we had done the other day. He started complaining again and saying that that was not what P.E. is and they should be playing. I then proceeded to tell him that we will be doing some activity in the beginning and the end. He lightened up a little bit and let me do what I do as a teacher. This class is one that cannot sit for more than 15 minutes or they start getting antsy and need to move. In the beginning of class, we did group juggling and saying the names of the people we were passing it to. I need to learn all of their names still. Then we got into the co-creating a curriculum and today we talked about physically and emotionally safe classroom environments. Today, I gave each person in the group a job. Only 1 student was the recorder and I think that this really helped with management. The other jobs included a spokesperson and an information keeper. Depending on group size, there might have been 2 information keepers: one for the spokesperson and one for the recorder. I saw that this made everything go a lot better and smoother. We did an activity (group juggling/name game) in the very beginning so they still had the illusion of being active. I also told the students that we would do another activity at the end of class but we had to get through the questioning part first. This helped to focus the students and settle them down to do their work.
So far I have done the co-created curriculum with 3 of the 6 classes. We still have yet to get to the morning classes, but won’t be able to until after spring break. They have already started a new unit and our cooperating teachers don’t want that to be interrupted. I think I found a way to do this type of curriculum with the students though. Being inactive for 90 minutes during what is supposed to be their P.E. class upsets some of the students. Doing an activity at the beginning and then sort of “bribing” them with an activity at the end seems to help the students stay on task and complete the work.
I said a couple weeks ago that elementary school might be the place for me, but really any place would be good for me. I can make it work wherever I go. If I set my mind to do something, I can usually do it and do a good job at it. I would prefer a middle school or high school not only because they might be more skill developed than the elementary students and because of some of the sports I could teach, but also because it is the most influential time during an adolescent’s life. They are the most vulnerable during the middle school years and trying to find their identities during this time. I think that I can make a big difference in a lot of young kids’ lives and be the positive role model they need.
I am barely a week into this placement. Who knows what’s going to happen next. I could love the rest of it or something could happen in which makes me not want do this age level. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.
We are building bridges with students and just like it takes some architects longer to build one bridge compared to another, it will take longer with some of the students. The students will both let you in their life immediately and be open with you or they will be reserved and you have to prove yourself as a teacher and friend before they feel comfortable around you. I have had some students come up and talk to me like they have known me forever and with others; it’s like pulling teeth for them to just say hi to you.
However, my colleague and I still stand at the doors at the beginning and end of every class to greet the students and wish them good days. I have seen the students be more open to saying hi to us throughout the day when we see them outside of class. I really like how they come up and give you a high five and a fist to say hello. Once one student does it and another student sees it, it starts a rippled effect. I just like how the students are becoming more comfortable with coming up to us instead of staying away because they don’t know us yet. I think that they see that we are very cordial and amicable and it helps them feel safe. That’s the type of atmosphere that we teachers need to be making; an environment in which the students feel emotionally and physically safe.
Even in advisory at the end of the day, I sat down with a group of girls and just talked to them. These are the times that I enjoy the most because it is not so stressful and I can open up with the students. The students got a chance to ask me any questions they want and the students get a chance to get to know you more. In return, the students feel more comfortable to open up to me because I was willing to do so for them. You need to be a little open with the students in order to create that community and that bond you want to have with them.
There was a substitute today for one of the teachers. When I sat down next to him, he said “So you want to be a P.E. coach?” I smiled and replied, “No sir. I want to be a P.E. teacher.” “You don’t want to be a coach then?” “Yes I do want to be a coach, but a teacher is different than a coach. They are separate entities.” It really bugs me that people think that being a P.E. coach and being a P.E. teacher are one in the same thing. This level of thinking and mentally is what gives physical education a bad reputation. P.E. teachers are teachers like anyone else. We teach to have the kids learn. Coaches, on the other hand, yes they teach skills, drills, and strategies, but they do so for competition and winning. Teachers teach so students can be lifelong learners of physical activity.
I was really active with the students today. Rinalldo and I began doing their lap with them. Then for my classes, when we do the walk/run, I go out and do it with them. Coming in for Tae-Bo, I still am participating like them and with them. I was walking around and telling some of the students who really hate Tae-Bo that I don’t understand why they hate it so much when their form is so good. The one girl just smiled and the other boy I said this to said, “No miss.” I repeated “Yes you are. You have better form than half the kids in this class” He smiled. I can really motivate the students to pick up the intensity of their participation. For example, the Tae-Bo video was doing kicking. I started walking around the class telling the students to kick me in the hand (just to show them that they can kick higher). I found that the students did better when I did this for them. Either that or they just really wanted a chance to kick the teacher.
My second class went really well too. There are 34 students and I can proudly boast that I know all their names. I just hope that I can remember them the next time they come in to class next week. Rinalldo and I ran with the students again. It really does motivate them to do more. We tell the students that if they finish after us, they have to do it again. However, we walk the first half and then slowly jog the second half. We just want to push them to do more instead of what they are already doing. I even jumped into the stretches and warming up with the students. One girl looked at me and gave me a smile and thumbs up as if she was congratulating me for participating with everyone. After we did the stretches and running, we came back in and were waiting for all the students to go to their classes. I stood on the basketball court and all these girls just started coming up and talking to me. I can see that they are starting to get comfortable with me being there. I really like that feeling and knowing that the students are opening up to me.
My supervising teacher told me today, “Don’t show them any fear. They can smell fear.” This was said before my third class which is the one that caused me tears the first day. If anything, I displayed an exuberance to be here again. It’s a new day. I thank God for putting me in this situation and giving me the strength to show up once again. I thank Him for putting me in a position to be such an influence in these students’ lives. Daniel 12:3 states that “those who teach others to live right will shine like stars forever and ever.” My job is to not fear teaching, but to teach others to live right. I am not just teaching students how to be physically active, but through my teaching, I plan to teach these students to develop the abilities to be compassionate, respectful, and understanding of others. I will be teaching these students to be better people and things that they will carry through them for a lifetime. Therefore, there is no reason for me to be afraid of going to each class, regardless of what happened during the previous one.
My third class was a lot better this time. One student came and asked me what we were doing. I told him it was similar to what we had done the other day. He started complaining again and saying that that was not what P.E. is and they should be playing. I then proceeded to tell him that we will be doing some activity in the beginning and the end. He lightened up a little bit and let me do what I do as a teacher. This class is one that cannot sit for more than 15 minutes or they start getting antsy and need to move. In the beginning of class, we did group juggling and saying the names of the people we were passing it to. I need to learn all of their names still. Then we got into the co-creating a curriculum and today we talked about physically and emotionally safe classroom environments. Today, I gave each person in the group a job. Only 1 student was the recorder and I think that this really helped with management. The other jobs included a spokesperson and an information keeper. Depending on group size, there might have been 2 information keepers: one for the spokesperson and one for the recorder. I saw that this made everything go a lot better and smoother. We did an activity (group juggling/name game) in the very beginning so they still had the illusion of being active. I also told the students that we would do another activity at the end of class but we had to get through the questioning part first. This helped to focus the students and settle them down to do their work.
So far I have done the co-created curriculum with 3 of the 6 classes. We still have yet to get to the morning classes, but won’t be able to until after spring break. They have already started a new unit and our cooperating teachers don’t want that to be interrupted. I think I found a way to do this type of curriculum with the students though. Being inactive for 90 minutes during what is supposed to be their P.E. class upsets some of the students. Doing an activity at the beginning and then sort of “bribing” them with an activity at the end seems to help the students stay on task and complete the work.
I said a couple weeks ago that elementary school might be the place for me, but really any place would be good for me. I can make it work wherever I go. If I set my mind to do something, I can usually do it and do a good job at it. I would prefer a middle school or high school not only because they might be more skill developed than the elementary students and because of some of the sports I could teach, but also because it is the most influential time during an adolescent’s life. They are the most vulnerable during the middle school years and trying to find their identities during this time. I think that I can make a big difference in a lot of young kids’ lives and be the positive role model they need.
I am barely a week into this placement. Who knows what’s going to happen next. I could love the rest of it or something could happen in which makes me not want do this age level. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Day 3...Barriers and Rewards of Teaching (3/3/10)
Feeling a lot better as compared to yesterday. Read a nice little scripture that helped me to make sense of what was happening. Psalm 30:5 – Weeping may endure for the night, but joy will come in the morning. How true does God’s word ring in my ears right now! He has given me this uncanny ability to not worry about the things that happened in the past, but to move on and start fresh with every new day.
It feels as if we are going to be on our own for the next 8 weeks. The teachers don’t understand why we have to do a co-created curriculum with the students. The teacher’s put on a good front to the students by saying that the students are there to help us and we help them. They even explained to the students that we will be doing things a little differently this semester and it is okay to do different things. However, I know that as soon as those teachers get behind closed doors, the support is no longer there.
There are going to be several barriers to our success this semester. Aside from having no support, but there also seems to be a sexist card that the one teacher is playing. Every time I ask her about something or doing things a little differently, she always tells me that she has to run it by the other teacher (a male) first. In no way shape or form will the things I want to do interfere with his class, but it still has to be approved. I just wish that she could make decisions for herself and know that she has support for what she (and even I) is trying to do. I would have thought that our biggest resistance would have come from the students. However, this is not the case. It’s not student resistant, it’s teacher resistance.
It’s a shame that after one day of doing the student perceptions, one teacher is against what we are trying to do. This is definitely going to be a barrier to our teaching. Why do they have to be so resistance to change? We are not here to change the way you teach, but we are here to practice our teaching and just use the kids. He says, “You gotta do what you gotta do to pass, but the reality is not that. You can’t look at a study and think ‘I can do this.’ You have all these students who want to do something different and you can’t make them all happy.” I told him, “We aren’t going to please every student, but if we can reach the majority of students, then we have done our job. We aren’t going to try to do what every student says. We are going to take the results, look at what the majority wants, and adapt our teaching to them.” He is already basing judgments off of one day. He can’t see the end product or the bigger picture yet. Sitting down and getting to know the students only takes a few class periods. Like I tell the students, we have to do some of the boring stuff before we can get to what you want to do. I wish they would just open their ears and hear what the students are saying. They may have better participation and more engaged kids instead of them hating P.E., not participating, and dropping out. Don’t roll with the tides. Traditional ways hasn’t gotten us anywhere in P.E. You can’t be afraid to go against the flow of the river.
I can understand where they are coming from too. It is hard for me to see the end result just yet. I keep thinking, “Am I doing what I need to be an effective teacher?” “Am I doing this right and will it work out in the end?” It’s so easy to know what it looks like because I have already experienced this process on a smaller scale last semester, but now that I am doing it myself, I have to wonder if it’s going to really work. I am most certain that it will. It may not be like last semester and it probably won’t be because the students are different, but I can’t help but keep comparing what the students are saying to what was said last semester. It’s almost as if I am holding last semester as the standard and if the classes this spring do not meet those expectations, then I will think it’s a failure and I didn’t do my job.
After watching the teachers and their mannerisms over the past 3 days, it’s really hard to find the positives of what they are doing. I know it’s hard to come into a class hoping to student teach near the end of the school year, but some of the things they are doing, I think are things they do all the time. While students are stretching and running, a teacher might be on the phone or just sitting along the wall. You need to get up and be active with the kids. You’re job is to not just teach and leave, but to interact and create a relationship with the students. They respect you more and listen to you more than what they would if you didn’t know them.
It surprises me that after seeing all the students in the classes, there are maybe 3 or 4 students that are obese and a handful (6-7) that are overweight. I think that one of the reasons for this is the town that they live in. A lot of the schools around here are magnet schools and placed in the middle of the towns. A lot of students walk to and from school everyday day. This town is walker friendly and has plenty of opportunities for people to walk to and from places, not just the school. I think weather also helps out with this. It is typically sunny and warm and everywhere I go, there are always kids outside playing. Kids in this town have plenty of opportunity to be active; it’s whether or not they take advantage of it.
The first class today was really good. I know all their names now. I even got them motivated to run, but I told them they could only start running if I called them by name. At this challenge, a few ran up to my face so that they could be called and begin their laps. They were really eager to see if I remembered their names and eager to begin their walk/run. The only challenge is remembering them the next time they come to class. The thing that is hard is they look so different in their gym clothes as compared to when they get ready for class again. After 15 minutes of the walk/run, we came back inside and did the Tae-Bo video. This class really enjoys doing the video and they don’t put up a big fuss like the other classes have.
The second hour is the adapted physical education hour. There’s nothing like being thrown into teaching a class you haven’t met yet. One of our cooperating teachers told us we would be teaching them bowling today. There are only 4 students: 2 boys and 2 girls. These kids are the best. It just reminds me of working with my other student at my last placement. I enjoy going in and being with them because they are always smiling. Their hearts are genuine and you don’t have to worry about all the drama that can be found everywhere else in the schools. Yes, they may throw temper tantrums and fight with one another, but they still can be friends at the end of the day. There is something to be said about these students. They are just like any other student, but trapped in a body that is not their own. It will be interesting to see where this experience leads us. I have worked with students with disabilities before but my colleague has not. It will also be interesting to see how he develops over the course of 8 weeks while working with these students.
My third class was definitely the best class of the day. It is an honors class made up of eighth grade girls. It is a gender segregated class in which it is only the girls. With them, I started doing the student perceptions. I kind of changed up how I approached the class as compared to yesterdays. I didn’t hand out the materials right away and then explain it. I explained it first and then had them start. I tell you what! It was like night and day. The first class was chaotic but now this class was amazing. I loved this class! There was so much information and content that the students brought forth. They were really respectful towards each other and it was interesting to hear their opinions about being in a class of all girls. It was fascinating to be in the all girls’ class. After it was over, I thought to myself, “That was awesome. It was such a success. This is what co-creating a curriculum with the students looks like.” I think I am going to really like working with this all girl’s class. I don’t think it would be bad if it were all boys too. The dynamics are definitely different with these segregated classes.
My last class of the day was interesting. It was like a mix between the one the day before and the one I had earlier. They were not as chaotic, but they also were hard to get information from. I handled it a lot better than yesterday. I just let the kids talk and would bring them back sooner or later. I think that the content is there, it’s just hard to get them to talk about it. I am going to have to really look at what they wrote down in order to get the information. I also realized that what looks like chaos to me may not actually be chaos but just students talking. The content is there, I just have to open my eyes and ears to hear it and see it.
At first, I thought that this type of teaching/co-creation of curriculums could occur at the higher levels of high school. I thought that the middle school students weren’t mature enough to handle something different than what they knew and I couldn’t wrap my head around them being able to understand the implications of co-creating a curriculum. After doing three of the six classes with student perceptions, I see that this can be done. I was wrong to think that these students wouldn’t be able to do something like these. They want their voices to be heard just like any other student. I love looking the students in the eye while we are doing this project together and it’s almost as if they are speaking and saying “Thank you. Thank you for taking the time to listen to us and care enough to want to know what we are thinking.” You can just see it in their eyes that they are glad we are listening to them.
I think it might be hard to keep all these classes straight all the time. I have all of these classes with separate folders and labels to try to make it easy, but I still can foresee some of the problems of doing all these classes at once. I don’t even know if it will really matter that much because it appears that the students are consistently saying the same things across the board, but it is those unique things of each class that I need and want to remember. I am pretty sure that as I get to know the students and work with each class, the differences and my ability to distinguish between each class will be evident.
It is so nice to have my colleague here to go through the same process as I am going through. I don’t have to worry about being alone. He really helps me to think about things I might have forgotten and help me to see things in different perspectives. I like the times that we get together and have a debriefing session amongst ourselves between classes or during breaks. I love the intellectual talks that we have and I really enjoy just listening to him talk. He helps me to think at a higher level and more critically about things and situations that are occurring in class. The only thing about being paired with this is his relationship with the one teacher. They go way back and there is some bad blood between them. While it is not overly evident or that big of a hindrance, I can see it spilling over and effecting the way we both are teaching, maybe him more so than me.
Tomorrow should be another good day. The weather is supposed to be good and I will be seeing that last class tomorrow (the one I cried after). We will have to see how it goes this time.
It feels as if we are going to be on our own for the next 8 weeks. The teachers don’t understand why we have to do a co-created curriculum with the students. The teacher’s put on a good front to the students by saying that the students are there to help us and we help them. They even explained to the students that we will be doing things a little differently this semester and it is okay to do different things. However, I know that as soon as those teachers get behind closed doors, the support is no longer there.
There are going to be several barriers to our success this semester. Aside from having no support, but there also seems to be a sexist card that the one teacher is playing. Every time I ask her about something or doing things a little differently, she always tells me that she has to run it by the other teacher (a male) first. In no way shape or form will the things I want to do interfere with his class, but it still has to be approved. I just wish that she could make decisions for herself and know that she has support for what she (and even I) is trying to do. I would have thought that our biggest resistance would have come from the students. However, this is not the case. It’s not student resistant, it’s teacher resistance.
It’s a shame that after one day of doing the student perceptions, one teacher is against what we are trying to do. This is definitely going to be a barrier to our teaching. Why do they have to be so resistance to change? We are not here to change the way you teach, but we are here to practice our teaching and just use the kids. He says, “You gotta do what you gotta do to pass, but the reality is not that. You can’t look at a study and think ‘I can do this.’ You have all these students who want to do something different and you can’t make them all happy.” I told him, “We aren’t going to please every student, but if we can reach the majority of students, then we have done our job. We aren’t going to try to do what every student says. We are going to take the results, look at what the majority wants, and adapt our teaching to them.” He is already basing judgments off of one day. He can’t see the end product or the bigger picture yet. Sitting down and getting to know the students only takes a few class periods. Like I tell the students, we have to do some of the boring stuff before we can get to what you want to do. I wish they would just open their ears and hear what the students are saying. They may have better participation and more engaged kids instead of them hating P.E., not participating, and dropping out. Don’t roll with the tides. Traditional ways hasn’t gotten us anywhere in P.E. You can’t be afraid to go against the flow of the river.
I can understand where they are coming from too. It is hard for me to see the end result just yet. I keep thinking, “Am I doing what I need to be an effective teacher?” “Am I doing this right and will it work out in the end?” It’s so easy to know what it looks like because I have already experienced this process on a smaller scale last semester, but now that I am doing it myself, I have to wonder if it’s going to really work. I am most certain that it will. It may not be like last semester and it probably won’t be because the students are different, but I can’t help but keep comparing what the students are saying to what was said last semester. It’s almost as if I am holding last semester as the standard and if the classes this spring do not meet those expectations, then I will think it’s a failure and I didn’t do my job.
After watching the teachers and their mannerisms over the past 3 days, it’s really hard to find the positives of what they are doing. I know it’s hard to come into a class hoping to student teach near the end of the school year, but some of the things they are doing, I think are things they do all the time. While students are stretching and running, a teacher might be on the phone or just sitting along the wall. You need to get up and be active with the kids. You’re job is to not just teach and leave, but to interact and create a relationship with the students. They respect you more and listen to you more than what they would if you didn’t know them.
It surprises me that after seeing all the students in the classes, there are maybe 3 or 4 students that are obese and a handful (6-7) that are overweight. I think that one of the reasons for this is the town that they live in. A lot of the schools around here are magnet schools and placed in the middle of the towns. A lot of students walk to and from school everyday day. This town is walker friendly and has plenty of opportunities for people to walk to and from places, not just the school. I think weather also helps out with this. It is typically sunny and warm and everywhere I go, there are always kids outside playing. Kids in this town have plenty of opportunity to be active; it’s whether or not they take advantage of it.
The first class today was really good. I know all their names now. I even got them motivated to run, but I told them they could only start running if I called them by name. At this challenge, a few ran up to my face so that they could be called and begin their laps. They were really eager to see if I remembered their names and eager to begin their walk/run. The only challenge is remembering them the next time they come to class. The thing that is hard is they look so different in their gym clothes as compared to when they get ready for class again. After 15 minutes of the walk/run, we came back inside and did the Tae-Bo video. This class really enjoys doing the video and they don’t put up a big fuss like the other classes have.
The second hour is the adapted physical education hour. There’s nothing like being thrown into teaching a class you haven’t met yet. One of our cooperating teachers told us we would be teaching them bowling today. There are only 4 students: 2 boys and 2 girls. These kids are the best. It just reminds me of working with my other student at my last placement. I enjoy going in and being with them because they are always smiling. Their hearts are genuine and you don’t have to worry about all the drama that can be found everywhere else in the schools. Yes, they may throw temper tantrums and fight with one another, but they still can be friends at the end of the day. There is something to be said about these students. They are just like any other student, but trapped in a body that is not their own. It will be interesting to see where this experience leads us. I have worked with students with disabilities before but my colleague has not. It will also be interesting to see how he develops over the course of 8 weeks while working with these students.
My third class was definitely the best class of the day. It is an honors class made up of eighth grade girls. It is a gender segregated class in which it is only the girls. With them, I started doing the student perceptions. I kind of changed up how I approached the class as compared to yesterdays. I didn’t hand out the materials right away and then explain it. I explained it first and then had them start. I tell you what! It was like night and day. The first class was chaotic but now this class was amazing. I loved this class! There was so much information and content that the students brought forth. They were really respectful towards each other and it was interesting to hear their opinions about being in a class of all girls. It was fascinating to be in the all girls’ class. After it was over, I thought to myself, “That was awesome. It was such a success. This is what co-creating a curriculum with the students looks like.” I think I am going to really like working with this all girl’s class. I don’t think it would be bad if it were all boys too. The dynamics are definitely different with these segregated classes.
My last class of the day was interesting. It was like a mix between the one the day before and the one I had earlier. They were not as chaotic, but they also were hard to get information from. I handled it a lot better than yesterday. I just let the kids talk and would bring them back sooner or later. I think that the content is there, it’s just hard to get them to talk about it. I am going to have to really look at what they wrote down in order to get the information. I also realized that what looks like chaos to me may not actually be chaos but just students talking. The content is there, I just have to open my eyes and ears to hear it and see it.
At first, I thought that this type of teaching/co-creation of curriculums could occur at the higher levels of high school. I thought that the middle school students weren’t mature enough to handle something different than what they knew and I couldn’t wrap my head around them being able to understand the implications of co-creating a curriculum. After doing three of the six classes with student perceptions, I see that this can be done. I was wrong to think that these students wouldn’t be able to do something like these. They want their voices to be heard just like any other student. I love looking the students in the eye while we are doing this project together and it’s almost as if they are speaking and saying “Thank you. Thank you for taking the time to listen to us and care enough to want to know what we are thinking.” You can just see it in their eyes that they are glad we are listening to them.
I think it might be hard to keep all these classes straight all the time. I have all of these classes with separate folders and labels to try to make it easy, but I still can foresee some of the problems of doing all these classes at once. I don’t even know if it will really matter that much because it appears that the students are consistently saying the same things across the board, but it is those unique things of each class that I need and want to remember. I am pretty sure that as I get to know the students and work with each class, the differences and my ability to distinguish between each class will be evident.
It is so nice to have my colleague here to go through the same process as I am going through. I don’t have to worry about being alone. He really helps me to think about things I might have forgotten and help me to see things in different perspectives. I like the times that we get together and have a debriefing session amongst ourselves between classes or during breaks. I love the intellectual talks that we have and I really enjoy just listening to him talk. He helps me to think at a higher level and more critically about things and situations that are occurring in class. The only thing about being paired with this is his relationship with the one teacher. They go way back and there is some bad blood between them. While it is not overly evident or that big of a hindrance, I can see it spilling over and effecting the way we both are teaching, maybe him more so than me.
Tomorrow should be another good day. The weather is supposed to be good and I will be seeing that last class tomorrow (the one I cried after). We will have to see how it goes this time.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Day 2...Tears for the Day, but Joy Comes With the Morning (3/2/10)
I love it how other people that I know are exclaiming that student teachers have got it easy. No longer do we have to worry about taking tests, finishing up homework, or cramming and staying up all hours of the night. When I hear people talking about this, I have to disagree with their statements. Yes, we don’t have written exams anymore. No, we don’t have to go to a class in which we listen to a teacher talk, but we do have tests. We get tested every day! We are tested by our students in more ways than you can think of when you are preparing to become a teacher and we don’t even get a multiple choice question or a true/false. The tests are more complicated and more intense. We are not questioned on how much we studied and memorized.
Teaching is like an exam filled with open ended questions. Now we are the teachers in the classroom and while we may not have actual homework to turn in, if we don’t prepare for the classes we teach, then it’s just the same as not doing our homework. So no, it’s not better having any classes, exams, or homework. We may not be graded on a 4.0 scale anymore, but what we are doing is much more than that. Our successes and failures come at the hands of our students. No longer can we just worry about ourselves anymore; we have to worry about if our kids are learning in our classes. We have all of that every day, plus so much more.
I feel so uncomfortable in the locker room. I know what it was like for me in middle school/high school that I don’t want the students to feel like I am infringing on their personal space. During this time, I just go out into the gym and wait for the students to emerge from the locker room. In our teacher education program, that is the one thing we never really have talked about. This is a whole new ballgame; a whole new experience that a beginning teacher has to find out as they go. I don’t think any teacher education program across the country can prepare students for events and situations that may occur in locker rooms. It’s a learn as you go process and at this time, I am not learning a thing because I am not in there. I just need to overstep this comfort zone thing and find out how the students function in this area of physical education.
My first class today was a rough one and it’s full of 8th graders. It was a way to start out my second day here at the middle school. If I would’ve just seen that this was foreshadowing and setting up how the rest of the day would be, maybe I could’ve caught the signs earlier and began to rework how things were going to play out, but I guess hindsight is 20-20. They started doing Tae-Bo as well. As soon as the teacher turned on the video and left the class for a little bit, the students did absolutely nothing, not even one of them. They just kind of stood there looking dumbfounded. They knew what they were supposed to be doing, but as soon as the authority figure walked out of the room, everything went down the drain. I was trying to tell them how to do what the video was instructing them to do, but they weren’t having it. They just kind of stared at me and still did nothing. I guess I haven’t built a sense of rapport with the students yet for them to feel comfortable around me. That will take some time and I realize that.
It was a nice change and quite a surprise that the students gave us a round of applause just for being student teachers. I guess for them they enjoy having student teachers. It’s nice to see that students at this age are still excited about participating and being in physical education. The second class had 34 students in it and it is a 6th grade class. It was a really tight fit with all those students in a small aerobics room. It restricted some of the students’ movements. The students would start moving when the teacher came back in, but she left once again and the students stopped doing the videotape. It was interesting to see they dynamics change with and without the teacher.
I started with student perceptions with the last class of the day. They are a 7th grade class with 34 students. I don’t know who these kids are and haven’t had the chance to observe them and how they behave. I think that today’s lesson would’ve gone a lot better had I know what kind of students I was going to be working with. Granted, it’s all a part of the learning experience and I don’t even know that I would change anything the way I taught today. I think I would’ve just felt more comfortable had I seen the kids once before.
Nonetheless, I continued on with my lesson and had the students split themselves up into groups of 4. I explained to them the reasons for what we were doing and why we are doing it. I proceeded to give them all the materials that they needed to do the activity. I tried doing each question one by one, but giving the students the questions on a sheet of paper did not facilitate this process. As soon as they started, I felt as if things were starting to get chaotic. I could feel the class slipping away from me as more and more time passed by. As I was walking through the groups, I was thinking to myself, “What have you gotten yourself in to? You can’t do this.” After giving adequate time to answer those questions and discuss it with their group members, I brought them all back into a larger group so we could discuss what they had just did. I tried telling them that the one thing I expected from them was respect and that they listen to their classmates. However, it didn’t happen this way.
Long story short, I was very flustered at the end of it. As soon as the last student left the class, I just felt this rush of emotion and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. It was only a matter of time before the dam broke loose and all it took was one simple question from my supervising teacher. “If you had to teach this lesson again in 10 minutes, what would you change?” I had to sit on the opposite side of the room and put my hand up for a minute. The moment I began talking, I knew I would start crying and sure enough, I did. I was beating myself up for not having the lesson go according to my plan. I don’t know why I do this. I felt embarrassed because of what had just transpired. I felt embarrassed because here I was crying for no reason at all.
I tend to do that a lot more these days. I don’t know exactly the underlying cause to my screwed up emotions. I need to learn to take those moments and just look at the positives of what’s going on. The students are talking; I just need to open my ears to listen to them. (As I write that statement, I can’t help but think of the passage I just read in Mark 4:23 – If anyone has ears to hear, let them hear. It’s amazing how the Lord works in our lives without us knowing the reasons why. I can’t help but chuckle to have this epiphany at a time of weakness. The Lord does know what we are going through. We just have to open our ears to hear what He has to say; the same way we need to listen to our students.) I am thankful to have my supervising teacher there to help me with these situations. I know it is going to be hard to implement something the kids have never experienced before and something that is still very new to me. Sometimes I feel like a burden onto her, especially when she is always checking up on me to see if everything is okay. I don’t want to make her worry about me, particularly when what is going on is juvenile and I’m crying over things that are not very important in the grander scheme of things. It’s a learning process and it takes time, but I am ever so thankful to have her around to help keep my feet on the ground and keep me from running away from things when times get tough. She is truly someone I am grateful for and enjoy having in my life.
Tomorrow is a new day and I am thankful for the optimism I have while going into things. I could shut down and be a coward, but the Lord has granted me with a wonderful gift of being able to move on from things, no matter how terrible. I am able to see the next day as being a new day and have the ability to put the past in the past. I take those things, learn from it, grow in ways I can’t wrap my head around, and continue to pursue the goals I have set. The obstacles are just a part of everything in life and we can let them slow us down or we can plow right through them and be better people because of it. Tomorrow is truly a new day. :)
Teaching is like an exam filled with open ended questions. Now we are the teachers in the classroom and while we may not have actual homework to turn in, if we don’t prepare for the classes we teach, then it’s just the same as not doing our homework. So no, it’s not better having any classes, exams, or homework. We may not be graded on a 4.0 scale anymore, but what we are doing is much more than that. Our successes and failures come at the hands of our students. No longer can we just worry about ourselves anymore; we have to worry about if our kids are learning in our classes. We have all of that every day, plus so much more.
I feel so uncomfortable in the locker room. I know what it was like for me in middle school/high school that I don’t want the students to feel like I am infringing on their personal space. During this time, I just go out into the gym and wait for the students to emerge from the locker room. In our teacher education program, that is the one thing we never really have talked about. This is a whole new ballgame; a whole new experience that a beginning teacher has to find out as they go. I don’t think any teacher education program across the country can prepare students for events and situations that may occur in locker rooms. It’s a learn as you go process and at this time, I am not learning a thing because I am not in there. I just need to overstep this comfort zone thing and find out how the students function in this area of physical education.
My first class today was a rough one and it’s full of 8th graders. It was a way to start out my second day here at the middle school. If I would’ve just seen that this was foreshadowing and setting up how the rest of the day would be, maybe I could’ve caught the signs earlier and began to rework how things were going to play out, but I guess hindsight is 20-20. They started doing Tae-Bo as well. As soon as the teacher turned on the video and left the class for a little bit, the students did absolutely nothing, not even one of them. They just kind of stood there looking dumbfounded. They knew what they were supposed to be doing, but as soon as the authority figure walked out of the room, everything went down the drain. I was trying to tell them how to do what the video was instructing them to do, but they weren’t having it. They just kind of stared at me and still did nothing. I guess I haven’t built a sense of rapport with the students yet for them to feel comfortable around me. That will take some time and I realize that.
It was a nice change and quite a surprise that the students gave us a round of applause just for being student teachers. I guess for them they enjoy having student teachers. It’s nice to see that students at this age are still excited about participating and being in physical education. The second class had 34 students in it and it is a 6th grade class. It was a really tight fit with all those students in a small aerobics room. It restricted some of the students’ movements. The students would start moving when the teacher came back in, but she left once again and the students stopped doing the videotape. It was interesting to see they dynamics change with and without the teacher.
I started with student perceptions with the last class of the day. They are a 7th grade class with 34 students. I don’t know who these kids are and haven’t had the chance to observe them and how they behave. I think that today’s lesson would’ve gone a lot better had I know what kind of students I was going to be working with. Granted, it’s all a part of the learning experience and I don’t even know that I would change anything the way I taught today. I think I would’ve just felt more comfortable had I seen the kids once before.
Nonetheless, I continued on with my lesson and had the students split themselves up into groups of 4. I explained to them the reasons for what we were doing and why we are doing it. I proceeded to give them all the materials that they needed to do the activity. I tried doing each question one by one, but giving the students the questions on a sheet of paper did not facilitate this process. As soon as they started, I felt as if things were starting to get chaotic. I could feel the class slipping away from me as more and more time passed by. As I was walking through the groups, I was thinking to myself, “What have you gotten yourself in to? You can’t do this.” After giving adequate time to answer those questions and discuss it with their group members, I brought them all back into a larger group so we could discuss what they had just did. I tried telling them that the one thing I expected from them was respect and that they listen to their classmates. However, it didn’t happen this way.
Long story short, I was very flustered at the end of it. As soon as the last student left the class, I just felt this rush of emotion and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. It was only a matter of time before the dam broke loose and all it took was one simple question from my supervising teacher. “If you had to teach this lesson again in 10 minutes, what would you change?” I had to sit on the opposite side of the room and put my hand up for a minute. The moment I began talking, I knew I would start crying and sure enough, I did. I was beating myself up for not having the lesson go according to my plan. I don’t know why I do this. I felt embarrassed because of what had just transpired. I felt embarrassed because here I was crying for no reason at all.
I tend to do that a lot more these days. I don’t know exactly the underlying cause to my screwed up emotions. I need to learn to take those moments and just look at the positives of what’s going on. The students are talking; I just need to open my ears to listen to them. (As I write that statement, I can’t help but think of the passage I just read in Mark 4:23 – If anyone has ears to hear, let them hear. It’s amazing how the Lord works in our lives without us knowing the reasons why. I can’t help but chuckle to have this epiphany at a time of weakness. The Lord does know what we are going through. We just have to open our ears to hear what He has to say; the same way we need to listen to our students.) I am thankful to have my supervising teacher there to help me with these situations. I know it is going to be hard to implement something the kids have never experienced before and something that is still very new to me. Sometimes I feel like a burden onto her, especially when she is always checking up on me to see if everything is okay. I don’t want to make her worry about me, particularly when what is going on is juvenile and I’m crying over things that are not very important in the grander scheme of things. It’s a learning process and it takes time, but I am ever so thankful to have her around to help keep my feet on the ground and keep me from running away from things when times get tough. She is truly someone I am grateful for and enjoy having in my life.
Tomorrow is a new day and I am thankful for the optimism I have while going into things. I could shut down and be a coward, but the Lord has granted me with a wonderful gift of being able to move on from things, no matter how terrible. I am able to see the next day as being a new day and have the ability to put the past in the past. I take those things, learn from it, grow in ways I can’t wrap my head around, and continue to pursue the goals I have set. The obstacles are just a part of everything in life and we can let them slow us down or we can plow right through them and be better people because of it. Tomorrow is truly a new day. :)
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Day 1... New Day, New Placement, but Same Old Questions (3/1/10)
I walked out my door this morning to the sun greeting and beating upon my face. This is a new surprise since my last placement was much earlier in the morning. I took a deep breath of fresh air and welcomed this new day, this new challenge knowing that I would be given the strength to make it through any obstacle. As soon as the sun rose this morning, I couldn’t help but imagine my spirits, enthusiasm, and optimism rising with it. Today is the first day of my middle school placement. Whereas all those are rising within me now, I can’t help but feel a sense of queasiness in the pit of my stomach. As all those questions arose the first day of my elementary school placement, I found myself asking those same old questions as well as greeted a handful of new questions. Will I be any good at this? Will the students like me? Can I be an effective teacher? Will what is being asked of me, will I be able to get through to the students the importance of listening to them to make P.E. better? Will they take to this new and different way of teaching, something different than what they know? Can I teach this grade level?
I couldn’t wait any longer in my car and watch as the minutes and the children pass by, I had to walk into the school. In all of my eagerness to get to the school, I arrived a little too early for my cooperating teachers and my colleague that will be alongside me during this transition and placement. The first class is supposed to start at 8:35 and the teachers didn’t stroll in until 8:15-8:20. This caught me by surprise because I was expecting them to be there at least a little earlier than that. I went to the office and sat down for 20 minutes waiting for my colleague and my cooperating teachers to get at the school. It was a little embarrassing because the one secretary kept telling me every 5 minutes that the teacher was going to be late and with the frequent glances in my direction. I was content to sit there, but as the minutes passed by, I grew more nervous.
As these students are passing by, I am trying to look at them and see if I can see any resemblance from the students I came from and if there is any relationship with them. The first couple of students I encountered, I asked, and to my dismay, no relations to students over at my other school. I don’t know if I am seeking that out as part of a comfort thing; that it will provide me with a sense of relief or ease while I start this transition process.
I noticed today that I will be carrying a book bag around for the rest of my life. I won’t be able to escape this. I think this feeling also comes from being a comfort thing. To me, a back pack is the only thing I have really known for the past 16 years of my life. I carry a back pack everywhere I go. It’s one of those things that I rely on, almost like in the Dora cartoon. The back pack had anything that Dora needed for her expedition. I feel as if whatever I need will be found in my back pack whether it be a piece of paper, an opportunity to express my thoughts, or just one of those things that brings me a sense of identity. Without my back pack, I don’t know who I would be. It is part of my identity; it’s a symbol of my character and personality: the studious, ever achieving, over ambitious student. The back pack is one thing that I cannot escape in this life and it’s because it is the essence of my being. School is all I know.
These teachers are so different in their teaching styles. There is one teacher who is the disciplinarian. She yells at the students and takes care of most of the behavior shown by the students. The other teacher is more laid back and only steps into the disciplinarian mode when needed. The third teacher is rarely ever there, but she is kind of between the two. She can yell at the kids to get them back on task or she can just be laid back and let things go. The one thing that surprised me about this teacher though was that she openly stated that she takes her iPod outside and listens to it while she teaches. I couldn’t believe that she said this out loud to me and even the fact that she does it at all.
It feels so weird to only have three classes a day and a two hour break every day. I almost feel like a lost puppy. I have been looking around like, now what do I do? There is just so much time and I am used to back to back class schedules. This part of the transition will be hard for me to adjust to. I like the fact though that I can work out during that two hour break. However, at the same time, I feel like I am doing nothing during the day. I know we haven’t done anything right now because we are just observing, but it feels like we do nothing right now.
There is no room for screw ups or being lazy during this placement. Things are so scheduled and we only have today for observations. Tomorrow we immediately dive into getting student’s perception. It’s going to be weird to see how I adjust to these students. I have to listen to more attitude and language from the students at this level than I had to with the elementary students. I am still trying to find myself in how I can discipline students at this level because it will be so different than students at the elementary level. I talked with my cooperating teacher about what she has done and she explained to me that the students know they have to go run a lap if they get in trouble. Also, with this level, students can now be written up and have to serve detention. I still don’t know the limitations or what constitutes writing a student up. I guess I will find that out as we go along.
Students begin each class with sitting around for the first 10 minutes and waiting for the teachers to take role and the rest of the students to get out of the locker rooms. The next 5 minutes is filled with students doing regimented exercises such as stretching, sit ups, and pushups. They then follow that with a 3-5 minute run around the football field. When they come back in, they get some water and then line up for their next P.E. activity. It will be interesting to see what the students have to say about this part of their P.E. classes when I have the chance to sit down and talk with them about their feelings and experiences in physical education.
My first class was nothing special. The students just got to switch classes. They are doing Tae-Bo. The only thing I did was help students with body placements and technique. I can’t wrap my head around why a teacher would have a unit in which they can’t teach it. The students go into the class, get in their rows, and they watch the videos and just follow along. I must be too much of a control freak that I need to be the one leading the class and not some video, or at least doing the video with them. I won’t lie though; there was a fleeting thought in which I said to myself “This isn’t so bad. I could see having the students learn and perform to a video.” Granted, doing this allows the teacher to walk around and give specific feedback to students as compared to leading the actual class, but I think that it can be balanced given the right amount of class management.
With the second class, it was the honors class. It is only 8th grade students and they are gender segregated. My class is all girls and my colleagues’ class is all boys during this period. These girls were finishing up their pickleball unit. The teacher allowed students to pick their own teams. As the students began playing, not only was it windy outside, but the courts were too big and the wiffle balls were too small for the games. This led to a lot of the ball being played out of bounds or short of the net. After watching the girls, I was thinking to myself “You have 3 week units and this is your last day of this one. It looks like this is day 1.” A lot of the girls would just be standing and talking and not really playing. There was a group of three girls where they were huddled in one part of the court and didn’t really participate with the team across the net. The teacher too just stood over on the fence the whole time. Her feedback and instruction to the girls on the furthest court was her yelling to them what to do. I don’t know if this was just because I was standing there and talking to her or if this is how she usually teaches.
The last class was a combination of both teachers’ classes. There were 40 students (give or take a few). Everyone played basketball and by everyone, I mean everyone! There were 5 people on a team and two teams per court, but because we were inside, that meant 10 people per half court. There was a lot of standing around (mainly by the girls and a few boys) and the boys dominated the games. The teachers stayed in the corner where the desk in and only lifted their voices to yell at the students or lift the whistle to the mouth to tell students to switch. It was nice to see that the students knew which way to rotate without any confusion. I know at the elementary school, you have to tell them every time or they tend to forget. It will be nice to work with this age group now.
To cap off the end of my day, I felt so bad for this girl because I caught her with a razor blade. She was scraping the paint off the table while in advisory (study hall) and I saw a shiny thing in her hand. Needless to say, it was a razor blade and not only was it her, but it was also her friend next to her. The teacher in the room had asked the one girl about it and it was amazing at how quickly she gave up her friend so that she wouldn’t implicate herself. The other girl then brought the razor blades up to the teacher and he was telling her about how having those was a suspendable offense. I could just feel her eyes searing right through me. I thought, “Geez Jenn. Way to get off to a start with these students. Already getting them in trouble.”
To quote my colleague, “This is a fisher price era. Everything is plastic.” How true does his words ring about today’s children. I would really like to know what the world would be like if it wasn’t connected. I remember, no matter how long ago, a time in which we didn’t have computers, cell phones, and iPods. Society is trying to teach these children how to be more of an individual. I think they are teaching them to be selfish. Yes, we want kids and the youth of America to think for themselves and to have their own opinions on certain things. We don’t want someone to think for them or become dependent on someone else, but it doesn’t mean we teach them not to work for the greater good of those around them. It has become more of a “me” society than a “we” society. Then we wonder why students in our schools can’t get along with their classmates and why there is more fighting amongst our youth. Everyone is out for themselves and rarely do you find that one student who is more mature than what he/she is surrounded by to see the bigger picture life. This is the fisher price era. It is more about what you have that you can prove (quantity) than the deeper meaning behind the little things you do have (quality).
Overall, the day was good. It’s nice to see that the students are still eager to come to physical education and participate in the activities. It goes against everything that I heard about students at the higher level. I can’t wait to see how my student perception’s lesson goes tomorrow. It will be something new for the students and something still fairly new for me. Wish me luck!
I couldn’t wait any longer in my car and watch as the minutes and the children pass by, I had to walk into the school. In all of my eagerness to get to the school, I arrived a little too early for my cooperating teachers and my colleague that will be alongside me during this transition and placement. The first class is supposed to start at 8:35 and the teachers didn’t stroll in until 8:15-8:20. This caught me by surprise because I was expecting them to be there at least a little earlier than that. I went to the office and sat down for 20 minutes waiting for my colleague and my cooperating teachers to get at the school. It was a little embarrassing because the one secretary kept telling me every 5 minutes that the teacher was going to be late and with the frequent glances in my direction. I was content to sit there, but as the minutes passed by, I grew more nervous.
As these students are passing by, I am trying to look at them and see if I can see any resemblance from the students I came from and if there is any relationship with them. The first couple of students I encountered, I asked, and to my dismay, no relations to students over at my other school. I don’t know if I am seeking that out as part of a comfort thing; that it will provide me with a sense of relief or ease while I start this transition process.
I noticed today that I will be carrying a book bag around for the rest of my life. I won’t be able to escape this. I think this feeling also comes from being a comfort thing. To me, a back pack is the only thing I have really known for the past 16 years of my life. I carry a back pack everywhere I go. It’s one of those things that I rely on, almost like in the Dora cartoon. The back pack had anything that Dora needed for her expedition. I feel as if whatever I need will be found in my back pack whether it be a piece of paper, an opportunity to express my thoughts, or just one of those things that brings me a sense of identity. Without my back pack, I don’t know who I would be. It is part of my identity; it’s a symbol of my character and personality: the studious, ever achieving, over ambitious student. The back pack is one thing that I cannot escape in this life and it’s because it is the essence of my being. School is all I know.
These teachers are so different in their teaching styles. There is one teacher who is the disciplinarian. She yells at the students and takes care of most of the behavior shown by the students. The other teacher is more laid back and only steps into the disciplinarian mode when needed. The third teacher is rarely ever there, but she is kind of between the two. She can yell at the kids to get them back on task or she can just be laid back and let things go. The one thing that surprised me about this teacher though was that she openly stated that she takes her iPod outside and listens to it while she teaches. I couldn’t believe that she said this out loud to me and even the fact that she does it at all.
It feels so weird to only have three classes a day and a two hour break every day. I almost feel like a lost puppy. I have been looking around like, now what do I do? There is just so much time and I am used to back to back class schedules. This part of the transition will be hard for me to adjust to. I like the fact though that I can work out during that two hour break. However, at the same time, I feel like I am doing nothing during the day. I know we haven’t done anything right now because we are just observing, but it feels like we do nothing right now.
There is no room for screw ups or being lazy during this placement. Things are so scheduled and we only have today for observations. Tomorrow we immediately dive into getting student’s perception. It’s going to be weird to see how I adjust to these students. I have to listen to more attitude and language from the students at this level than I had to with the elementary students. I am still trying to find myself in how I can discipline students at this level because it will be so different than students at the elementary level. I talked with my cooperating teacher about what she has done and she explained to me that the students know they have to go run a lap if they get in trouble. Also, with this level, students can now be written up and have to serve detention. I still don’t know the limitations or what constitutes writing a student up. I guess I will find that out as we go along.
Students begin each class with sitting around for the first 10 minutes and waiting for the teachers to take role and the rest of the students to get out of the locker rooms. The next 5 minutes is filled with students doing regimented exercises such as stretching, sit ups, and pushups. They then follow that with a 3-5 minute run around the football field. When they come back in, they get some water and then line up for their next P.E. activity. It will be interesting to see what the students have to say about this part of their P.E. classes when I have the chance to sit down and talk with them about their feelings and experiences in physical education.
My first class was nothing special. The students just got to switch classes. They are doing Tae-Bo. The only thing I did was help students with body placements and technique. I can’t wrap my head around why a teacher would have a unit in which they can’t teach it. The students go into the class, get in their rows, and they watch the videos and just follow along. I must be too much of a control freak that I need to be the one leading the class and not some video, or at least doing the video with them. I won’t lie though; there was a fleeting thought in which I said to myself “This isn’t so bad. I could see having the students learn and perform to a video.” Granted, doing this allows the teacher to walk around and give specific feedback to students as compared to leading the actual class, but I think that it can be balanced given the right amount of class management.
With the second class, it was the honors class. It is only 8th grade students and they are gender segregated. My class is all girls and my colleagues’ class is all boys during this period. These girls were finishing up their pickleball unit. The teacher allowed students to pick their own teams. As the students began playing, not only was it windy outside, but the courts were too big and the wiffle balls were too small for the games. This led to a lot of the ball being played out of bounds or short of the net. After watching the girls, I was thinking to myself “You have 3 week units and this is your last day of this one. It looks like this is day 1.” A lot of the girls would just be standing and talking and not really playing. There was a group of three girls where they were huddled in one part of the court and didn’t really participate with the team across the net. The teacher too just stood over on the fence the whole time. Her feedback and instruction to the girls on the furthest court was her yelling to them what to do. I don’t know if this was just because I was standing there and talking to her or if this is how she usually teaches.
The last class was a combination of both teachers’ classes. There were 40 students (give or take a few). Everyone played basketball and by everyone, I mean everyone! There were 5 people on a team and two teams per court, but because we were inside, that meant 10 people per half court. There was a lot of standing around (mainly by the girls and a few boys) and the boys dominated the games. The teachers stayed in the corner where the desk in and only lifted their voices to yell at the students or lift the whistle to the mouth to tell students to switch. It was nice to see that the students knew which way to rotate without any confusion. I know at the elementary school, you have to tell them every time or they tend to forget. It will be nice to work with this age group now.
To cap off the end of my day, I felt so bad for this girl because I caught her with a razor blade. She was scraping the paint off the table while in advisory (study hall) and I saw a shiny thing in her hand. Needless to say, it was a razor blade and not only was it her, but it was also her friend next to her. The teacher in the room had asked the one girl about it and it was amazing at how quickly she gave up her friend so that she wouldn’t implicate herself. The other girl then brought the razor blades up to the teacher and he was telling her about how having those was a suspendable offense. I could just feel her eyes searing right through me. I thought, “Geez Jenn. Way to get off to a start with these students. Already getting them in trouble.”
To quote my colleague, “This is a fisher price era. Everything is plastic.” How true does his words ring about today’s children. I would really like to know what the world would be like if it wasn’t connected. I remember, no matter how long ago, a time in which we didn’t have computers, cell phones, and iPods. Society is trying to teach these children how to be more of an individual. I think they are teaching them to be selfish. Yes, we want kids and the youth of America to think for themselves and to have their own opinions on certain things. We don’t want someone to think for them or become dependent on someone else, but it doesn’t mean we teach them not to work for the greater good of those around them. It has become more of a “me” society than a “we” society. Then we wonder why students in our schools can’t get along with their classmates and why there is more fighting amongst our youth. Everyone is out for themselves and rarely do you find that one student who is more mature than what he/she is surrounded by to see the bigger picture life. This is the fisher price era. It is more about what you have that you can prove (quantity) than the deeper meaning behind the little things you do have (quality).
Overall, the day was good. It’s nice to see that the students are still eager to come to physical education and participate in the activities. It goes against everything that I heard about students at the higher level. I can’t wait to see how my student perception’s lesson goes tomorrow. It will be something new for the students and something still fairly new for me. Wish me luck!
The Day Before the Change (2/28/10)
Tomorrow begins my first day at the middle school. While I am excited and nervous about starting this new assignment, I can’t help but think about the students and school I left behind. I got to go to the middle school the other day to talk to the teacher about the next eight weeks. I don’t know what to expect from this next placement. I am so afraid of the unknown and how the students will take to this new co-created curriculum. I am afraid that I won’t implement it as well as I can or that it won’t go as well as I want it to. I do only get 7 weeks with them though because we are going to the AAHPERD conference in two weeks.
On top of all of that, there will be an observer almost every day. I know that after time I will get used to it, but for now, I am nervous. We have to go, only get to observe one day, and then immediately get into teaching. There is no room for error because it’s the last eight weeks before school is let out. We have no room for mix ups or being behind. We don’t even get a full week to observe the students, see how the teachers teach, learn the protocols, and prepare ourselves for the assignment. I don’t know exactly how to describe how I feel about it. Guess we’ll have to wait and see how it all goes.
One nice thing is that I don’t have to be up until 7:15 now. That was the time I had to be at my last placement. It will be nice to get that extra hour to sleep in, but then again, I don’t get out until 3:45 whereas before I got out at 3:00. I guess it will be a nice trade off. Maybe this time I will get to ride my bike more because it being warmer as the day gets on. Before, it would still be dark out and freezing in the morning that it deterred me from riding. Both schools are close by so it will be almost the same distance. The middle school is just a little further up the street.
I hope that this placement will develop along just like the last one. Only time will tell. Wish me luck!
On top of all of that, there will be an observer almost every day. I know that after time I will get used to it, but for now, I am nervous. We have to go, only get to observe one day, and then immediately get into teaching. There is no room for error because it’s the last eight weeks before school is let out. We have no room for mix ups or being behind. We don’t even get a full week to observe the students, see how the teachers teach, learn the protocols, and prepare ourselves for the assignment. I don’t know exactly how to describe how I feel about it. Guess we’ll have to wait and see how it all goes.
One nice thing is that I don’t have to be up until 7:15 now. That was the time I had to be at my last placement. It will be nice to get that extra hour to sleep in, but then again, I don’t get out until 3:45 whereas before I got out at 3:00. I guess it will be a nice trade off. Maybe this time I will get to ride my bike more because it being warmer as the day gets on. Before, it would still be dark out and freezing in the morning that it deterred me from riding. Both schools are close by so it will be almost the same distance. The middle school is just a little further up the street.
I hope that this placement will develop along just like the last one. Only time will tell. Wish me luck!
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